Peace, and Happiness
by maximasdecimas
Summary: To save the galaxy, Shepard chose to destroy the Reapers... but the Citadel was all but destroyed. Everyone believes she must be dead. Everyone but Liara. Shepard promised she was always coming back... A Shepard F!/Liara fanfiction story, set at the end of ME3, and a little bit after. My own attempt at closure, and a bright, happy ending. Rated M to be safe; violence/adult themes
1. Chapter 1

**Peace, and Happiness**

* * *

**_Author's note: ME3 ending spoilers ahead._**

_First up, I want to say that I do love the Mass Effect games. Bioware did a fantastic job in my opinion... with everything except for the very ending of the trilogy, sadly. This is a story taking the extended cut ending's attempt at fixing the gaping plot holes into account, but trying to fill the immense void still left by the lack of emotional closure. This is for those who chose the 'Destroy' ending where Shepard's fate is 'left open' so she may 'live', yet were still deeply unsatisfied and upset by the fact that, as far as the endings seem to imply, even if Shepard is left breathing at the end, everyone including her squad and love interest - in my case, Liara - still believes she is dead, therefore why would anyone go looking for her to find her trapped beneath the rubble of the Citadel, meaning she's probably going to die regardless, only of starvation or suffocation or bleeding out instead, so much slower and more drawn out and painful than the instant-kill of the other choices, so... that's the 'best' ending, is it? Huh. __Anyway, having waited for the extended cut in the hopes of seeing this resolved; since it wasn't really, I have now decided to write a short story to deal with what I felt ought to have been included. This way I can play the Mass Effect games again someday, if I have a post-ending story with the emotional resolution that I, as an emotionally invested player, seriously need. I had read other stories that have already done this, and done it well, though the ones I read were written before the EC release, and now with my heart once again bleeding in my hands, I find myself compelled to write my own ending, because reading them again no longer works. I don't know why... but I guess I just needed to do this. For my own Shepard and Liara._

_So, here it begins. __I should also note that this work is complete as it is; I wanted to post it all at once. _It definitely won't be my best work, and it will be very short; certainly not be anywhere near the length of my other story, 'A World Without Shadows'. Just a couple of short chapters, but I aim to make it do for me what the EC didn't. I won't call my Shepard by her first name, and will try not to describe her in great detail, so that she fits most back-stories and custom faces. Except she won't match Renegade players, I guess, since I always play Paragon. For the record, I also always play Shepard as a Colonist War Hero Vanguard. But I'll try not to let that come into the story. And you'll probably have to be a little flexible with squad mate choices, previous mission choices, etc. I also haven't lost any squad mates except Kaidan on previous playthroughs, so everyone will probably get a mention. But really the only thing I will focus on is the destruction of the Reapers, and Shepard and Liara. It will contain spoilers for the Extended Cut ending, but after what other closure that provided, the rest of it (barring the characters and sci-fi stuff that Bioware came up with, etc) is my own imagination at work. _Hopefully, anyway.__ I haven't read any ending-related Mass Effect stories since the EC came out in an effort not to be influenced and do the exact same thing as them, but if at any time there's something in here that seems to be suspiciously close to someone else's idea, then I apologise. Having been the victim of it myself, I do not like plagiarism, and would never intentionally try to pass off another person's work as my own. If far-too-similar plots/themes occur, then it's either a case of great minds thinking alike if I haven't read the story, and unintentional plagiarism that must be altered if I have read it. _

_Anyway, long-winded author ranting done with, on with the story. __Rated M to be safe. For violence and adult themes, I guess._

* * *

___**Chapter 1**_

* * *

Shepard took another step.

_Breathe._

_Move forward._

_Keep... moving... keep breathing... got to... got to finish this..._

_Finish them..._

Another step. And another. Again.

_Keep... going..._

Each laboured, dragging,_ agonising_ step brought Shepard closer to the mass of wires and circuits enclosed in their protective casing; the fate of every organic, every synthetic, every Reaper in existence awaiting her choice. A choice already made, long ago, before the invasion, before the Collectors, even before that god damn beacon burned the nightmare vision of war and death and unimaginable horror into her mind. A choice made the moment that she first saw Sovereign as it blasted into the skies of Eden Prime, incinerating an entire colony without feeling or mercy, without a thought. Even before knowing that it was far more than just a ship, even before knowing what the Reapers were, that decision was made; whatever this thing was, one thing was certain.

She had to destroy it.

Destroy them all.

Her eyes stayed fixed on the power conduit at the far end of the ledge to her right as she fought to keep her balance and keep going, keep forcing herself onwards. In her current condition, it was a battle every bit as fierce as the fight against Sovereign or the Collectors, every bit as brutal and desperate as the one still being waged on the world so far below, on every Reaper occupied world. Between the terrible firefight to defend the missile battery from the never-ending rush of brutes, banshees, husks, even harvesters, and the disastrous run to the beam afterwards with Harbinger taking shots, there didn't seem to be any part of her that hadn't taken damage. Searing agony tore through her body with every step she took.

A twenty metre walk had never seemed so far...

_"Damn it, Shepard, don't you dare quit now!" _The harsh, gruff voice of her old training master Gunnery Chief Ellison hollered in her head, urging her on._ "There's no room for goldbricking in _my_ unit, soldier, so get. Your. God. Damn. Ass. _MOVING!"

_Yes... yes, sir!_

She responded to the command like the soldier she was; ignoring the pain, forcing one foot in front of the other through the haze of fatigue and exhaustion threatening to overwhelm her with every step. But the Alliance trained its soldiers well, pushing them to the absolute limits of their physical capabilities, and then pushing them even further. The gruelling ordeals of the N7 training went beyond even that, into realms of physical and mental endurance beyond imagining, trials and torments that taught recruits to find a way to keep going through anything. Shepard's will, her indomitable spirit, forced her torn and broken body to go on, to move, to do what her mind told her was impossible. So she did.

She always did.

_Almost... there..._

Shepard reached the end of the cold metal ramp and stumbled onward, step by step by step, her pistol held loosely in the hand dangling at her side as she cradled her other blistered, bleeding arm against her stomach, trying to staunch the steady trickle of blood from the wound in her side. Whether it was from Harbinger's beam, or a gunshot, she couldn't remember... but she hurt like god-damn hell all over anyway, so... it wasn't important. Not anymore. There was only one thing that mattered now; the gun in her hand, and the circuitry before her, the circuitry that kept the Reapers linked to the Citadel and the Catalyst; their source of power and purpose. Destroying it. Destroying the Reapers. Putting an end to them. An end to this war, spanning countless millennia, countless cycles. Countless losses, countless lives. Countless species. An end to the pain, and death, and destruction. The extinction.

An end, once and for all.

_Just a few more steps..._

_A few more..._

_Now._

Shepard raised the pistol, her broken, bleeding body screaming in protest at the movement, and fired. Again. And again. Every bullet was for every victim, every martyr, every sacrifice of this godforsaken war, this galactic massacre. For the lives of the living, fighting right in this moment. The soldiers and civilians. Every father, daughter, mother, son. For every unborn child. For the futures of each one of them, and for the generations yet to come, if they could only have their chance. For her squad mates, her crew, her friends...

For Liara...

_Oh, Liara..._

She could see the beautiful asari in her mind's eye, the memory as clear and sharp as if living the moment over again... her and Liara, and one last moment of peace...

* * *

...

_'How are the casualties?'_

_The asari glanced briefly away from her omni-tool as she registered Shepard's entrance into the makeshift med bay, quickly returning her attention to her scan of the injured man lying supine on the rough cot in the corner of the room. 'They haven't brought in many more wounded.' she answered quietly._

_That was, if not good news, at least better than Shepard had expected. She looked the soldier over briefly. A few wounds, but nothing that looked too serious, and only minor damage to his hard-suit. Assuming his inbuilt medi-gel dispenser was still functional and the on-duty medic wasn't killed applying field dressings when the next enemy assault broke through the defensive perimeter, he would probably see tomorrow. If it came. 'That's something,' the Commander ventured, trying to sound positive._

_Liara nodded a little as she ended the scan, keeping her face turned away from the Commander as she shut down her omni-tool and crossed her arms beneath her breasts, her manner defensive, withdrawn. Never a good sign at the best of times, even given Liara's quiet and somewhat introvertive nature, but now... now was not the time to be seclusive. Shepard touched her arm gently, the contact usually allowing her to feel Liara through the mental and often near-physical bond between them; yet another strange and wonderful trait of the ever-adaptable asari Shepard never ceased to marvel at. This time, however, she felt nothing, though truth be told she knew why. Being human, Shepard was only able to passively receive; she could not reach out to Liara to feel her thoughts and emotions unless the asari opened their bond and allowed her into her mind, joining her consciousness to Shepard's, guiding her. Ever since their talk on the Citadel when Shepard had, with loving patience, once again reassured Liara in no uncertain terms that she wanted to be with her for the rest of her life, Liara had used every private moment the two had together to allow the Commander into her mind and heart until Shepard felt she knew Liara inside and out, immeasurably strengthening their bond so that with a touch, Shepard could instantly tell exactly how Liara was feeling, even sense her thoughts on occasion. But their connection relied entirely on Liara to drive it. Right now, Liara was keeping herself closed to her, which Shepard was sure could only mean one thing._

_Liara was frightened... terrified... and she didn't want Shepard to know._

_Of course she was scared. She should be scared; they all should be. But they couldn't let it master them. Which meant she couldn't let Liara try to hold this inside. Not now. 'How are you holding up, Liara?' Shepard asked gently._

_Liara stared at the unmoving form of the wounded soldier on the stretcher before her, blue eyes wide and unseeing. 'This... is it, isn't it?' _

_Shepard's heart bled at the note of ill-concealed fear in her lover's soft voice. She took a step towards her, trying to come up with something comforting. But at this point... what was there to say? Nothing that wouldn't sound like empty platitudes. All she could do was answer just to let Liara know she was here, that she wasn't alone. Maybe that would be enough. 'Yeah,' she replied after a moment. Simply. Truthfully. 'This is it.'_

_Liara hugged herself tighter, dropping her head. 'I... don't know what to say,' she almost whispered. __The young asari glanced at Shepard, noting the look of deep concern in her eyes and tried to smile for her; an act of bravery in itself, given the circumstances. __Her voice quivered, and the Commander could see she was trembling slightly. _'All those little blue children are going to be disappointed I didn't have a speech.' 

Oh, Liara..._ Shepard felt her throat tighten. 'We'll make up a good story for them.'_

_..._

* * *

Shepard tore herself forcefully away from the memory, coughing out a humourless laugh as she shook her head slightly. A good story. She fired again, eyes narrowed as the bullets hit the reinforced glass and glanced off harmlessly. What a story this would have been. No need to make something up; no one would ever believe this, not even children. Maybe it was for the best that... that when she was dead, no one else would ever know about this. That what really drove the Reapers was some unexplained God-like supercomputer...

_Right. _

The bitter part of Shepard's mind raged helplessly at her situation, even as her body continued to shoot, as her feet carried her forward to her end. _Only there'll be no little blue children to tell stories to, will there? Not now._ _Everything I've done, all I've given for everyone else in the galaxy... and this is my reward. One last, ultimate sacrifice. No good deed goes unpunished, huh? I suppose... if I do this... no one will know what I did, or what happened here, but... at least they'll know the Reapers were destroyed because of it. That would make for a better ending. _

The corner of Shepard's mouth turned up briefly in the barest ghost of a wry grin. _Even if I could make it out of this, somehow... Have... have little blue children to tell stories to... I think I'd have to try and make up something more believable to tell them. __I'm no writer, but even I know a deus ex machina is a terrible way to end a story._

_Maybe it's for the best that only I will ever know about this. Better this way. Better that... that I'm alone... that my friends were all safe, relatively speaking. My team. My family. Those with me from the very beginning, who stuck with me through it all... _

_Doctor Chakwas... Karin. You were like a mother to me, doc. To all of us._

_Joker. My smart-ass helmsman. Brimful of humour, dedication and arrogance. Fully justified, of course._

_EDI... you sure as hell came a long way from that little rogue VI system that tried to kill me on the moon. Fully aware, utterly loyal, and completely, undeniably alive. No question. I'm sorry, God, I'm sorry, but... I... I have to do this. _

_Ash... you were a pain in my ass, sometimes, but a damn amusing one. Whatever our differences, I'm glad you saw your way clear to trusting me again. _

_Tali. You always stood by me through everything. Even when Cerberus had me under their thumb, you stayed. You never let me down. You're an amazing woman. And you'll make one hell of an admiral, kid._

_Garrus... I'll be looking down, brother. Raising my glass to you. I'll always have your back. You always had mine._

_Liara..._

_Oh, Liara, I'm sorry... I'm not coming back this time, like I promised... but... you will have a chance, now. I'll make damn sure of that. I wish I could be with you... but I'm glad you aren't with me right now, love. Not this time._

Another memory flashed through Shepard's mind, unbidden, unstoppable...

* * *

...

_The heavy vehicle, so clumsy on open terrain, pirouetted gracefully in mid-air as it hit the downed Mako in front of it that had missed Shepard by bare inches moments before, launching it into the sky. Shepard was rising and running back even as she saw it fall as though in slow, torturous motion towards her squadmates, frozen in shock only a few steps behind her... towards Liara... _

_Her mind screamed. _No!

_Turian and asari broke the spell at the same instant, diving to either side as the falling Mako hit the rubble-strewn ground, bounced, flipped, landed, and burst into flames, the force of the blast ripping into Garrus and Liara, throwing them clear... _

_...but not unscathed. _

Liara!

_Shepard ran, leaping over the still-flaming vehicle, checking on Garrus, who waved her off with a reassuring nod as he clawed his way to his feet. She sprinted for Liara, lifted her with an arm about her slender waist and dragging Liara's arm across her own shoulders, supporting her as they stumbled into cover behind the downed MAKO, Garrus close behind them. Shepard examined Liara, heart in her mouth as she saw her lover covered in splatters of her own blood, running from countless tiny gashes and cuts from the debris of the exploding vehicle, her armour charred and blackened. She ran a medical diagnostic with her omni-tool and flinched at what she saw; broken ribs, a fractured humerus, torn ligaments in her right knee, concussion, second degree burns, internal bleeding..._

_Garrus peered out from the edge of their cover, clutching at his side. "Hammer is getting slaughtered out there," he coughed. "Harbinger is decimating us."_

_"We will make it through," Shepard said forcefully, her attention still on Liara, who slumped back against the MAKO, trying to quiet her agonised breathing. "Someone has to. This is our last shot."_

_Liara tried to rise, despite her injuries. "Then... we... we have to go..."_

_Shepard held her back. "Liara, stay down.' _

_Liara shook her head at Shepard, stubbornly pushing herself up. "I'm alright- ah!" She gasped as her leg trembled, protesting her weight. _

_"Stay down. That's an order." Shepard pushed her gently back to the ground, swiftly reassessing their situation as the rest of Hammer continued to surge past them. There was no way Liara could complete the run to the beam; she'd be incinerated in an instant. She made her decision._

_'Normandy, do you copy?" Shepard yelled into her comm, hoping desperately that Joker would hear. "I need an evac, right now!'_

_'We're taking heavy losses up here, Commander. Doing my best to break away.' A few seconds pause; a few too long for Shepard. She breathed an inaudible sigh of relief as Joker's affirmative buzzed in her ear over the crackling comm link. 'On our way, Commander.'_

_..._

* * *

Shepard fought to hold her aim steady, her arm trembling with the effort.

_Shoot._

_Again._

The bullets ricocheted off the impassive casing. No damage. Not even a scratch.

_God damn it..._

* * *

_..._

_The Normandy curved gracefully through the air, landing close to their position. Shepard felt her heart lift at the sight of it as the cargo bay door lowered. She drew Liara's arm across her shoulders again, all but carrying her across the uneven stretch of open ground towards the promise of the Normandy's relative safety, beckoning to Garrus with a jerk of her head._ _'Come on.'_

_They stumbled towards the open hatch as the shuttle bay crew opened covering fire; Liara's laboured breathing heavy in Shepard's ear. Despite the fact that Liara was clearly in pain, a very selfish part of Shepard was glad, because it meant that now Liara had a much higher chance of surviving this fight. Garrus too. She was glad, because now she had a fully justifiable excuse not to order her best friend and her soul mate to follow her to their deaths. _

_Garrus boarded the ramp ahead of them, turning to help as Shepard and Liara stumbled to a halt behind him. Shepard shifted her grip on Liara, transferring her gently into the turian's waiting arms. 'Here. Take her.'_

_Liara's frantic voice rang above the deafening sounds of battle as she felt the Commander's hands leave her. 'Shepard!' _

_'You gotta get out of here,' Shepard told her firmly, stepping back._

_'I'm all right, Shepard,' Liara protested, trying to look convincing as she gave Shepard a determined nod._

_The Commander wasn't fooled. 'Don't argue with me, Liara.' There was no way Liara was going to follow her this time. Shepard was not about to give in. She knew in her heart that the chances of her coming back alive were slim to none._

_So did Liara. The asari gasped painfully as she tried to pull out of Garrus's strong hold, straining towards Shepard, trying to go to her. 'You're _not_ leaving me behind...' _

_Shepard felt the heavy weight of the unspoken words in that desperate utterance, could see the naked fear in those azure eyes... As close as they were right now, Shepard could feel Liara's turmoil through their bond, feel her emotions, even sense her thoughts, racing so frantically as she stared desperately at her lover..._

...Liara wanted to be with Shepard at the end, she couldn't stand losing her again... she wanted them to return to the Goddess together, in her heart of hearts that was how she thought of it, despite, as Javik would put it, the primitive foolishness of subscribing to such a religion. But it was in the vernacular, and in the poetic language associated with death, with ending, and for Liara it felt... fitting. But now Shepard was sending her back to the Normandy, out of the fight, and she couldn't pretend to herself she could make it to the beam. Neither could she stop herself from protesting that she could. She didn't want to leave Shepard, to let her charge into certain death alone. She couldn't go on without her. Goddess, she couldn't... not again...

_'Not again...' Liara whispered aloud, and Shepard felt her heart break. 'Goddess, Shepard, please...'_

_'No matter what happens-' Shepard stepped in close, raising her hand to gently cup her lover's face, trying in that one small, momentary gesture to communicate a lifetime's worth of true and all-consuming love. 'You mean everything to me, Liara.' She brushed a gloved thumb gently over Liara's cheek. 'You always will.' Her voice broke a little over the words, and her eyes searched Liara's beautiful features for a long moment, before she began to move back. She had to... had to leave, had to go... the Catalyst..._

_..._

* * *

Her muscles screamed.

_Pull the trigger. Shoot. Again._

_Just..._

_Keep... keep firing... gotta break this bastard open..._

The tube casing fractured slightly. Shepard stumbled forward, fired again. Again.

_Do it... finish it..._

_Finish them... for her._

* * *

...

_Liara gazed into Shepard's eyes, the tell-tale stinging brightness of welling tears pricking her lashes. 'Shepard, I..." Unconsciously, she reached for Shepard even as the human pulled reluctantly away from her, neither willing to tear their gaze from one another, their thoughts and hearts still connected. The asari maiden stared into the eyes of her soldier, her lover. Her bond-mate, in everything but name. 'I am yours,' she all but whispered, but Shepard heard her, felt her, and she smiled, just a little. _

_'And I'm yours, Liara. Always.' _I love you more than _anything..._

_Shepard took a step backwards, and another, her eyes locked intently on Liara's face as though burning it into her thoughts, her memory, the very fibre of her being. Behind her, Harbinger bellowed, the sound a wretched clarion call back to the present, to the reality, the immediacy of now, and the impossible mission still before her. Shepard turned at the sound, gazing up at the tower of living metal looming over them. The fight wasn't over._

_She had to reach the Catalyst... or die trying._

_Shepard glanced back at Liara, still reaching for her, then looked to Garrus. 'Go!' she cried, her voice ringing with frantic command, her eyes blazing a last pleading message to her turian comrade._

Protect her...

_Garrus just nodded, speech failing him. Liara let her arm fall to her side as the Commander gave Liara one last desperate, lingering look, watching Garrus half leading, half carrying Liara back into the hold as the young asari tried to hold back her tears... and then Shepard turned and ran towards the beam, hearing the Normandy roar into the air behind her as she dodged and sprinted with the stragglers of the Hammer unit towards Harbinger, towards the beam... towards the end... _

_..._

* * *

Shepard redoubled her efforts as the power conduit casing cracked, weakened slowly, shot by shot, under her assault.

_Another shot... one more..._

_There!_

The casing splintered, then shattered... the wires exposed at last...

Shepard sighted down the barrel. One more shot... and another, for good measure... a spark, a flame...

The world exploded around her.

Flashes... faces... friends. Family.

Legion. Thane. Mordin. Lost.

Anderson. Gone.

EDI.

_Sacrificed._

_Oh, EDI... I'm sorry..._

Liara...

_...forgive me... my love..._

Fire...

Pain...

...darkness.


	2. Chapter 2

**_Author's Note:_**

_I am trying to work as best I can within Mass Effect lore, but I may have taken a small liberty or two with the story so that it makes sense to me. For instance; deciding that the unknown garden world the Normandy has crashed on, for my purposes, is Terra Nova because the Normandy needed to be close enough to Earth to be able to reach it relatively quickly with only FTL drive (since the mass relays need repairing before they can work, apparently) and these planets are in the systems closest to Sol. And from the codex descriptions Terra Nova could plausibly have rainforest type areas and therefore possibly be the planet they crashed on. It needed to be close enough for them to get there in time to help find Shepard before she dies of starvation, dehydration, suffocation, shock, or just plain bleeds out. Or any combination thereof. If a canon planet name emerges, hopefully this can be easily changed and incorporated, but for now; Terra Nova. Yes, I know, I think about this stuff too much. I just wanted it to be as immersive as possible. I also may have decided to not kill certain cybernetic warfare suites and networked artificial intelligences. I know this has been done, but I want to do it too, I don't see why they have to die. Not after working so hard in the damn game to make them truly alive. So I came up with some space magic reason for why they aren't dead. You may have to suspend your disbelief a bit, but if you like the idea of EDI and the geth being allowed to live without killing Shepard, then it'll be worth it. If not, well... sorry, but I guess that's too bad. No synthetic genocide for you. Not here, at least. Or, I guess just pretend I killed them, or something. Anyway, I always end up rambling too much in my author notes. If you are actually reading this, I both commend you for your efforts and apologise. _

_Without further delay, here is the next chapter._

* * *

**_Chapter 2_**

* * *

_Goddess... this can't be true..._

The long, thin plaque felt cold and heavy in her hands. Cold, heavy, and cruelly real.

_But... but she can't be. She can't be... gone. Not again._

_She promised me. _

_She _promised _me..._

Liara swallowed hard, her vision swimming as her eyes filled with tears, seeing Shepard's beautiful face suddenly before her, the gentle smile she always wore for her lover melting Liara's heart even as it made it ache with loss and desperate longing... just as it had before...

The last time...

* * *

_..._

_'I spent two years mourning you.'_

_Shepard's hands jerked a little in Liara's own at her words, and a pained look flashed across her face, but she kept Liara's gaze and didn't interrupt. _

_'So if we're going to try this...' Liara continued, knowing it was a foolish promise to exact. After all, it wasn't as though Shepard meant to die in the first place, was it? But she needed, for her own sake, to hear her fearless soldier say the words. Maybe then she could make herself believe it. 'I need to know you're always coming back.'_

_Shepard smiled her reassurance as she looked steadily into Liara's eyes. 'I'm always coming back,' she affirmed without hesitation. 'I promise.'_

_'Are you sure?' Liara asked hesitantly as Shepard slid her strong arms firmly about her lover's waist._

_The Commander's smile widened, becoming wicked as she leaned in closer, hands drifting purposefully over the asari's lower back, making her shiver in anticipation. Shepard's voice was a husky whisper, sending thrills up and down Liara's spine. _

_'I haven't stayed dead yet...'_

_..._

* * *

_She hasn't. She wouldn't._

_She can't be..._

'Liara...'

She blinked as she felt the firm but gentle pressure of the three fingered hand on her shoulder, heard the soft, comm-filtered voice, its distinctive burr broken by a clear note of sorrow and sympathy. Tali tightened her grip slightly. 'It... it's time, Liara.'

Liara felt her hands clench reflexively around the plaque. She didn't want to do this. It was too real. She glanced at Tali, watching the quarian's shining eyes blink rapidly behind her mask, seeing a downcast Garrus just behind her, nodding to Liara in silent support. She tried very hard not to feel resentful of him. Or of Tali. She saw Joker standing with EDI beside him, organic and synthetic fingers intertwined at their sides, saw James with his arm around a teary Ash, and she tried. Tried not to feel bitter that they all still had one another. However new their relationships were, they could still take comfort in that. In each other. She tried not to begrudge them what she had lost for the second time. Only Javik stood alone, as she did now, meeting her gaze with a face devoid of expression. She felt a familiar anger rise and tried to push it down, tried not to glare at the impassive Prothean. She had yet to forgive him for holding her back when she tried to get to the bridge, to stop Joker from leaving, even though she knew it was a childish response. She knew he did what he had to, just as somewhere deep inside, she knew they had to leave or be caught in the full blast of the Catalyst's pulse.

Even though it meant leaving Shepard.

Leaving her to die...

* * *

_..._

_'Please, try to remain still, Liara.' Doctor Chakwas' voice was urgent as she once again pressed Liara back down onto the medbay bed. 'You risk causing yourself further harm if you try to move.'_

_Liara struggled feebly against the doctor's restraining hand. It had been too long, why hadn't they heard anything? Wouldn't they have heard by now, if someone had reached the Citadel? Why would no one tell her anything? 'Where is Shepard? I have to know! Did she make it?' _

_'Someone did,' Garrus said, limping into the med bay. His injuries from the vehicle explosion had only been relatively minor; he had been on his feet again minutes after Chakwas had finished patching him up, heading straight for the bridge to monitor the situation in person. 'Hackett says two humans made it. Biometric analysis scans show that it's Anderson and Shepard. They've been on the Citadel for nearly fifteen minutes, but nothing is happening.'_

_'Is Shepard alright?' Liara asked, locking gazes with the turian desperately. She couldn't stand this, couldn't stand not knowing... 'Is she hurt? What's happening?'_

_'She's-" Garrus began, then cut himself off abruptly, shifting uncomfortably from foot to foot. Dread formed in the pit of Liara's stomach. What had he been going to say? Why did he change it? What was wrong? Garrus sighed. "Her armour's metabolic scans are weak," he said at last. "She may be wounded, or it may just be that her hard-suit computer has suffered damage, EDI says there is too much Reaper signal interference to tell, and we haven't re-established a comm link with her yet. At least, we hadn't a few moments ago when I left the bridge." He held her gaze. "But she is alive.'_

At least, she was when you left the bridge,_ Liara thought, uncomforted. _Wounded... goddess._ 'We have to go back. We have to help her!'_

_Garrus gestured helplessly, sympathy and understanding in his piercing avian eyes. 'Reaper forces have the beam surrounded. We can't reach her. Even if we could, you are in no condition to go groundside.'_

_'Listen to the turian, Liara asari,' Javik said, stepping up suddenly behind him. 'You are no use to anyone as you are. The battle is over for you. Rest. And trust in your human.' He turned to Garrus. 'The arms of the Citadel have opened. The Crucible is docked, though the weapon has not fired. The Commander has been contacted by your Hackett human. She is still on the Citadel.'_

_Liara tried to sit up again, ignoring the deep stab of pain the medigel failed to dull, and was once again pushed back by the doctor's insistent hands. 'What did she say? Is she alright?'_

_'She said nothing of significance, from what the Traynor human could tell me. She was incoherent, then fell silent. Since then, she has not said anything in some time," Javik stated bluntly. "But the Anderson human's lifesigns have failed. He has passed.'_

_Doctor Chakwas raised a hand to her mouth, staring at the Prothean with wide, pained eyes. 'You don't mean...'_

_..._

* * *

Admiral David Anderson.

Liara stared at the plaque on the memorial wall before her, placed there moments ago by Doctor Chakwas, who knew him longer than anyone on the Normandy. They knew before they fled the Sol system that he had perished on the Citadel. The scans were clear.

But... Shepard... They had lost her signal. They didn't know she was... not for certain.

She could have survived. EDI's biometric scans had shown that she was still alive when the Crucible had fired.

There was still a chance that Shepard wasn't...

* * *

_..._

_'Dead.' Javik confirmed. 'I am afraid so, human.'_

_'Oh, no,' Chakwas said, her voice hushed with sorrow. 'Oh, David...'_

_Mechanical whirrs and buzzing announced the approach of EDI's physical platform moments before she entered the medbay._

_'What are you doing here, machine?' the Prothean asked, his lip slightly curled in distaste. 'Does your human thrall not need your supervision on the bridge?'_

_The AI glanced at him, with a look on her synthetic features that could have been annoyance. 'Joker does not currently require my presence,' she answered coolly, then turned from him abruptly, speaking directly to the others in the room. 'Sensors indicate the weapon is about to fire.'_

_'Spirits,' Garrus breathed, his voice low and heavy with awe. 'Shepard did it.'_

_'Yes,' EDI confirmed. 'That is the logical conclusion.'_

_Behind her, Javik crossed his arms. 'You needed to come here to tell us this?'_

_'No. Data sent before at the completion of the Crucible project indicates that, while its projected range and power will enable it to affect Reaper forces throughout the galaxy, its targeting matrix remains unrefined. The weapon will direct its energy toward all synthetic life,' EDI stated, moving quickly across the room towards the AI core. 'However, this eventuality was not unforseen. I am here to initiate defensive protocols to protect myself from the Crucible.'_

_'And the geth?' Chakwas asked, genuine concern in her cultured voice. Concern that Liara shared, given their experiences with Legion, and knowing the faith her Commander had in him and his people. Or would have shared, were she not so frantic about Shepard herself._

_EDI looked back at the doctor as she opened the door. 'I sent a message before the Crucible reached Earth. The geth who are not part of the Fleet have already undertaken similar measures.' She paused. 'However, those currently engaging the Reaper forces are unlikely to survive the firing of the Crucible.' _

_'What about Shepard?' Liara asked, desperation raising the volume of her voice, which came out harsher than she meant._

_'She is alive,' EDI said, turning to look at the asari directly. She hesitated. 'But we have lost track of her location. Joker is keeping the Normandy on standby while Specialist Traynor attempts a biometric scan of the Citadel, extrapolating from the Commander's last known position. If Shepard's current location is obtained before the weapon is fully ready to fire, Lieutenant Cortez may have time to extract her. If not-' EDI broke off abruptly, but each organic in the room silently completed the unspoken sentence regardless._

If not... they would have to leave her there.

_Liara felt her panic rising. Goddess, if they couldn't find her... a weapon of such magnitude would take several minutes to arm, but how much time had passed already? _

_EDI looked at Garrus. 'Some of my protocols require manual assistance which I will be unable to complete unaided. If you are not otherwise occupied, may I ask for your help?" _

_'Of course.' Garrus nodded without hesitation, following EDI into the AI core. 'What do you need me to do?'_

_"Initiate a fail-safe program after I have transferred from this platform. It will not be complicated, but time is limited,' Liara heard EDI say as the AI core doors slid shut behind them. Her tone, though controlled, was urgent, which only served to increase Liara's desperation. There was so little time, and still no word on Shepard. Surely they would have heard something by now..._

_The ship-wide comm link crackled, and Liara looked instinctively at the ceiling, hardly daring to hope as Admiral Hackett's gruff, commanding tone issued from the well-concealed speakers;_

_"All fleets; the Crucible is armed. Disengage and head to the rendezvous point."_

_A cold chill of fear stole over the asari's body. No, not yet. Shepard was still on the Citadel! They couldn't leave her! Joker couldn't... he wouldn't..._

_"I repeat: disengage, and get the hell out of here."_

_She felt the subtle shift of the artificial gravity, compensating as the Normandy turned sharply._

_No!_

_Liara struggled up from the bed, brushing Doctor Chakwas aside with a renewed strength born of adrenalin and terror. She lunged for the comm link button beside the screen on the doctor's cluttered desk, opening the channel between the medbay and the bridge._

_'Joker? Joker, what's going on? Did you find Shepard? Is she alright? Is she on board?' Maybe there hadn't been time to inform the rest of the crew that they had found her. Joker would never leave Shepard behind. Maybe Cortez had gone in the shuttle, and they were on route to pick them up before obeying Hackett's orders... _

_'Liara...' The choked, harsh voice on the comm wasn't Joker's. Liara felt her blood freeze completely. She had never heard Ashley sound anything other than brash and cocky, full of confidence and unconcern, feigned or otherwise. To hear her now, barely holding back tears, did more to crush her hope and heart than anything else could have. Shepard was still on the Citadel. They hadn't found her. They were going to leave her. 'I'm sorry...' Ash whispered._

_Oh, no. No. _

_No!_

_'We have to find her!' Liara called urgently, desperately into the comm. 'We have to get her out of there! We can't leave her down there, Jeff, please!'_

_'The Crucible is fully charged, Doctor T'Soni,' Specialist Traynor spoke next over the channel, her soft voice only marginally more controlled then Ash's. 'It's about to fire. We have to get out of range. I... I can't pinpoint the Commander's location, and... I'm so sorry, Liara... there just... there isn't time...' _

_Reason fled. 'No!' She stumbled for the medbay doors, intending to get to the bridge. She would force Joker to turn the ship around if she had to. They were _not_ leaving Shepard behind!_

_Chakwas tried to catch her arm, tried to stop her before she reached the doors. 'Liara, stop! Your injuries-' _

_The frantic asari raised her biotic barriers, and Chakwas let go with a gasp as the contact with the thin mass effect field stung her flesh. Liara staggered out into the corridor- and was abruptly halted as a pair of sinewy arms caught her from behind. 'No, Liara T'Soni,' Javik said firmly. 'There is nothing you can do. Do not be foolish. The Commander is lost. You must accept.'_

_'No!' She fought his grasp with everything she had, the piercing agony flooding her heart superseding the pain in her body. 'Let me go! Shepard!' _

_'If you have any biotic suppressants, human, I recommend using them,' Javik called over his shoulder to the doctor as Liara let a wave of power jolt through his body. He absorbed it somehow, some trick of Prothean biotics, and ignored her efforts to escape his grasp, dragging her writhing, struggling form inexorably back into the medbay. 'She is quite powerful.'_

_The Normandy's doctor murmured in reluctant assent. 'I still have some stores of Omega-Enkaphalin in here somewhere,' she said, moving to her desk. 'One of Cerberus's slightly less-repulsive experiments, which I was meant to use on Jack, if she got out of hand. I kept it hidden when the Alliance locked down the ship; I imagined it may have been... useful.' Liara saw Chakwas take a small bottle of liquid and a hypodermic needle from a medical chest, and struggled harder, but her every move was countered by the stoic Prothean soldier. Chakwas moved toward her; she felt a sharp pinprick of pain in her arm and felt her biotics weaken instantly, her powers rendered ineffectual for the time being. The doctor touched the asari's shoulder as her body jerked with shock. 'I'm so sorry, Liara.'_

_'I suggest she also be restrained,' Javik said conversationally to Chakwas, using Liara's brief moment of stunned stillness to lay her on the bed. She tried to get up, but he pressed her back, holding her in place with gentle, immovable strength as she fought him uselessly. 'In this state, she will only cause herself further damage.'_

_Chakwas agreed. 'I'm sorry,' she said again, securing Liara's wrists and ankles with the movement-restricting straps on the bed's railings as Javik held the struggling asari firmly down. 'Javik is right; you risk making your injuries worse. Shepard wouldn't want you hurting yourself on her behalf.' _

_Liara let out a desperate cry. "But she is alive! She is on the Citadel! We have to go back!" _

_'Liara, there is nothing that can be done.' Doctor Chakwas sounded very close to tears. 'None of us want to leave her, but... we have no choice.'_

_"Shepard would never leave any of us behind!" Liara cried, sobbing as she stared desperately at the doctor, who met Liara's eyes briefly and turned away as her own began to fill. "Not if there was even a chance to-" _

_Javik interrupted her as Chakwas opened another med kit behind him. 'The Commander knew the costs of a soldier's life. The same cost of defeating the Reapers. She would want you to be safe, asari.' All four of the Prothean's eyes fixed on Liara's tear-streaked face, a touch of sympathy in his grave voice. 'Her sacrifice will be honoured in the future she has won for us.' _

_NO!_

_Liara screamed, and the sound was pure pain. She fought uselessly against the restraints. 'SHEPARD!'_

_Chakwas returned to her bedside, a second hypodermic in her gloved hands. Another pinprick, and this time Liara felt her body go limp, her mind becoming clouded as the powerful sedative flooded her system, darkness closing in about her as her soul tore apart._

Shepard...

...

* * *

_Shepard._

Liara ran her fingers over the printed black letters of her soldier's name.

_Shepard. My love._

She felt the weight of the sympathetic stares on her back and raised her head. They were waiting... expecting her to... to...

_Goddess._

Liara took a deep, controlled breath, and then another. She stepped forward slowly, held the plaque up as though to place it on the wall... and stopped.

No. Her name did not belong here. Not yet.

They did not know for certain that she was dead. They only assumed. To place Shepard's name on the memorial wall would amount to giving up all hope that she was still alive. To deny the possibility that somehow, Shepard could have beaten the odds again and survived the destruction of the Citadel. If she placed this plaque and consigned Shepard's name to the list of the dead, she would be giving up on her completely.

Liara couldn't do that. She wouldn't.

She refused.

Liara looked up, letting the smallest ghost of a smile curve her lips as she stepped back from the memorial wall. Shepard was alive. She knew it. She felt it.

And she knew what she had to do.

She turned to the others standing expectantly behind her. 'I... I can't do it,' she said simply.

A moment of silence as they looked at her, identical expressions of knowing sympathy on each face, and then Doctor Chakwas stepped toward her.

'Shall I-?'

'No.' Liara instinctively took a step backwards, gripping the plaque harder. 'I mean I won't do it. It isn't right. I can't believe Shepard is dead. I won't.'

She watched calmly as they exchanged concerned looks. It was clear they didn't share her conviction; rather they assumed her denial was simply a product of her grief, her inability to accept the situation. Perhaps she was in denial. Perhaps they were right, and there was no chance Shepard could have survived being on the Citadel when the Catalyst fired. Perhaps, perhaps not, but Liara would not simply give up on Shepard without so much as looking for her. After all, what if she had given up on her the last time everyone believed she was gone? True, they no longer had Cerberus resources to rely on in order to resurrect Shepard, should she truly be... dead, but... there was a chance she was alive, and in need of medical attention. She could be saved. They had to at least try and find her as though they knew for certain she was alive. Liara had to fight for her.

'Liara...' Traynor stepped toward her from where she stood with Cortez at the back of the group. 'You know I re-established a comm link with Admiral Hackett's fleet. The ships that were still FTL capable after the pulse returned to Earth. By all reports, the Citadel is in ruins. Biometric scans aren't currently picking anything up, but they clearly showed that the Commander was at an unspecified location near the Presidium Ring when the beam fired. She... she had to have been...' The Specialist's voice faltered, and she fell silent, unable to complete the sentence.

Liara took her chance. 'Listen, please,' she began urgently, glancing from face to face. 'We know she was on the Citadel, but not where. We know she was alive. We don't have anything other than odds and statistics to make us believe otherwise now. Isn't it possible she could still be alive?'

'It's not like she hasn't beaten the odds before...' Garrus said slowly, and Tali nodded eagerly beside him, glowing eyes flashing hopefully.

'Keelah, that's true!'

'I hate to be the voice of... I don't know, reason or pessimism, or whatever, but... Shepard's not invincible,' Joker began, his tone hesitant.

'I certainly know that,' Liara interrupted, an edge to her voice. She looked him in the eye. 'I lost Shepard once, Jeff.' _I watched from my escape pod. I watched her die. When she died to save you; because you wouldn't leave the ship. _Liara didn't say it out loud, she would never try to hurt him that way, but Joker visibly flinched, reading the thought in her eyes. Liara felt a stab of remorse but pressed her advantage regardless, relentlessly, using the opportunity to appeal to Joker's guilt. 'I can't go through that again. But I don't believe she is dead. I won't believe it until we find... until I see her...' _Body._ She couldn't say it. 'We have to look for her. We have to try. She would do no less for any of us.'

'Well... well, yeah, but... Liara... I mean, come on,' Joker began, brimful of his usual tact, though his voice was somewhat subdued now. 'Even if she did survive the Citadel exploding, Shepard was so full of implants and synthetic tech-junk that the beam would probably have...' His voice tailed away, and he sighed unhappily. 'Look... I really want to believe she's alive too, but... what are the chances?'

'The Commander's odds of survival in the scenario you depict are extremely remote, Jeff,' EDI answered, and Joker winced, scratching uncomfortably at his head beneath his trademark cap.

'It was a rhetorical question, EDI,' he said softly.

'Yes,' EDI agreed. 'But you did not let me finish. Had you allowed me to continue, I would have said that while it is true that Shepard is kept alive in great part by the cybernetic technology incorporated into her system, it is in no way capable of higher thought processes, and by itself, cannot be considered to be synthetic life. I am proof enough that the weapon, while undeniably unrefined, would not attack any technology it did not detect as being sentient. If my security measures were sufficient to deceive the weapon into disregarding me, then chances are high that Shepard, being in essence a fully human sapient, may also have escaped its effects.'

'So...' James spoke slowly, trying to clarify Edi's technical jargon for himself and the other crew members who didn't think _quite_ as fast as those in possession of enhanced artificial intelligence based on Reaper technology. 'So, you're saying since you conned the weapon into thinking you were just an insignificant little computer program, not a living synthetic, that Shepard's implants are probably fine? Even with all those Cerberus circuits inside her, the Crucible probably wouldn't've hit Shepard either 'cause it didn't target organics, and she's still human, more or less?'

'Yes. That is what I said.' EDI's voice was filled with a dry, controlled patience. 'More or less.'

Liara felt her heart lift at the sliver of true hope offered to her by the synthetic woman. 'Thank you, EDI,' she said gratefully.

'You are welcome,' EDI replied.

The mere sight of the sentient synthetic still standing alive and well before her, against all probability, gave Liara hope. The asari had not been privy to EDI's preservation protocols - though it had something with protecting her quantum blue box via some complicated technical method and temporarily downgrading her intelligence to that of a simple VI to escape the weapon's effect - and thus far, she had understandably been in no mood to ask about them in great detail. But whatever they had been, they had worked. After the crash, when they discovered the beam had knocked out half the ship's systems and they had found EDI's synthetic body lying motionless in the AI core, they had been afraid that she had been destroyed, despite whatever measures she had taken to protect her quantum blue box and her memory core. But Joker, with the help of Tali and the Normandy engineers, had been able to repair the android body, allowing EDI to 'awaken' from her hibernation-like protection protocols. She had lived, despite the odds being decidedly against her. But Joker knew what she was going to try and do, knew there was a chance she could survive, and he hadn't given up on her.

How could they think of doing less for Shepard?

EDI's smooth, synthesized voice broke into Liara's thoughts. 'Of course, allowing for the fact that it has taken twenty standard Earth hours to repair the Normandy's systems and FTL drive following the crash, if we are to execute a search and rescue mission, we must begin immediately. Assuming Shepard is indeed alive, she will undoubtedly require medical attention. The odds of her surviving for the duration of the time it would take us to find her are slight, but Shepard has beaten similar odds before.' She paused. 'Many times. Her continued existence despite such consistently low probabilities of success is exceedingly impressive.'

'When it comes to the human Commander, it seems nothing is impossible,' Javik put in quietly in an unexpected show of support.

'Yeah,' James grunted enthusiastically. 'You know what, prothean? You're right. What the hell were we thinking?'

Liara found herself echoing his sentiment. What, indeed? How could they doubt for even a moment that their Commander, the saviour of the galaxy, could have survived again? Shepard promised her she would. She _promised_, and she always kept her promises. She always came through.

Always came back.

Liara knew such thinking was not entirely reasonable, that there were things outside of Shepard's control that would make it impossible for her to fulfil every promise she might make, no matter how sincere, even if she did everything humanly possible to keep her word. But Shepard was no ordinary human. Not anymore... not with all the cybernetics and cutting edge tech Cerberus used to bring her back. She could have survived, if EDI was right that the implants wouldn't have been affected... and even if she was wrong, the Citadel was the origin point for the destructive pulse; perhaps it escaped the full devastating effect regardless...

_Goddess, please..._

'Is the FTL drive functional?' Liara directed her question to Tali, whose agitated body language and tone, when she spoke, indicated that she was already impatient to head for Earth.

'Yes,' the little quarian replied eagerly. 'The damage sustained in the crash was only minor, and easily fixed.' She paused, suddenly sounding hesitant. 'But without a working Mass Effect relay, it will still take us some time to get to the Citadel.'

That was true, but it did little to diminish Liara's hopes. Shepard was alive. Liara knew it, felt it in her heart. She always came back.

And when she couldn't... then Liara would cross the galaxy to bring her back herself.

It wouldn't be the first time.

'The Exodus cluster is not far from the Sol system,' Liara replied. 'Relatively speaking.'

'Given our current reserves of element zero, the FTL journey from Terra Nova to Earth can be completed within approximately forty-six hours without the need to refuel,' EDI stated helpfully. 'That puts us within an acceptable time frame to be able to discharge the Normandy's static electrical charge build up into Earth's magnetic field, since it is unlikely the Citadel's docking bay discharge facilities are currently functional.'

'It sure would be nice not to get fried alive before we can make it to Shepard,' Joker agreed. 'Can she make it that long? Assuming she's not already... you know?'

'There are too many variables for me to give you a simple or definitive answer to that question, Jeff,' EDI replied truthfully.

'But Liara is right; it isn't beyond the realms of possibility,' Doctor Chakwas put in, and glanced sympathetically at Liara. 'But we know she was wounded before the weapon fired, so we will need to act as though we were facing the worst case scenario of possible injuries. She might be able to survive without food or water for several days, but shock and blood loss will take its toll, along with the possibility of infection.' Liara felt her heart clench within her at the doctor's words, but nodded in agreement. It was terrifying, but it was true, and served to impress the urgency of the situation on everyone.

Samantha stepped forward, determined fire in her dark eyes. 'I can hail the remnants of the fleets and get everyone on board to start the search immediately.'

'Then what in the name of hell are we waiting for?' Ash said, renewed hope and resolve filling her voice as she stepped forward to open the elevator doors for the comm specialist, a 'let's get this moving, people' expression on her face. 'If we're gonna go save the skipper in time, then we gotta get this hunk of metal off the ground right now. Haul ass!'

Everyone scattered for their stations, ready to do whatever they could to help reach Earth as fast as possible. Liara felt more hopeful than she had felt since the moment she was forced to leave Shepard's side, something she had never intended to do again. And if she had her way, she never would. She felt the engines roar into life beneath her feet as she hurried along the corridor towards her quarters, meaning to send messages across the galaxy to as many of her operatives as she could contact, and collect whatever resources she could still manage to gather at this point to send to Shepard's aid. The minor damages to the Normandy's systems, sustained partly when the ship was caught in the Crucible's pulse and flung unceremoniously out of the failing Mass Effect field, and partly from Joker's subsequent emergency crash-landing on the uninhabited tropical southern continent of Terra Nova, had been fixed within a twenty four hour period. Given the relatively short distance between the Exodus cluster and the Sol system, even without functional Mass Effect relays, they could be back at Earth and on the Citadel to look for Shepard in less than two days, approximately three days in total after having left. If she and Samantha could send messages and get a search and rescue operation organised beforehand, it could drastically minimise the time spent looking through the ruins of the Citadel. Goddess willing, they might even find Shepard before the Normandy even reached the Local cluster.

Either way, she would not be alone long.

'Greetings, Doctor T'Soni.' The bright, glowing white orb of the infodrone sparked into life as Liara strode through the door into her quarters, already issuing orders to the little VI as she took her place at the monitor displaying all of her current Shadow Broker operations and resources.

'Glyph, send a missive to every active operative within 30 light years of the Sol system. Tell them to make their way to Earth as soon as possible to assist in search and rescue operations. And I want every agent to report their current status, location and available resources within the hour...'

Liara began the familiar process of losing herself in her work, just as she had after the fall of Thessia, helping the refugees as Shepard encouraged her to do. It had helped her then, and it would help now; to be doing something other than agonising over the wait. A little, at least. It was harder, though, so much harder, knowing that Shepard could be hurt and in pain right in this moment, maybe dying, and Liara was ten parsecs away in another star system. By the goddess, every moment seemed to drag out like millennia...

_Hold on, Shepard. _Liara thought, willing her heart and love to cross the ocean of stars between them. _Don't give up._ _We're coming for you. _

_Goddess, please... just hold on..._


	3. Chapter 3

_**Author's Note:**_

_Well, okay, I don't really have an author's note, exactly, I just wanted to reiterate that I'm not trying to make this a masterpiece, or anything. It's not polished, and it sure as hell isn't perfect, but it works for me for what I wanted it to be, and I hope it's at least a bit of an enjoyable read for you, which is why I thought I'd share it. Anyway, that's enough from me. For now._

* * *

_**UPDATE:**_

_**I altered part of this chapter to accommodate the changes to the dialogue between Shepard and the Catalyst when you play the Leviathan DLC. Only minor changes, but if you have not played Leviathan, this chapter contains some spoilers. Be warned.**_

* * *

_**Chapter 3**_

* * *

'Approaching the drop point, people.'

Liara watched the wreckage pass beneath them on the vid screen built into the Kodiak's interior wall as Cortez took them down, making for one of the few landing areas cleared completely of rubble to accommodate the incoming shuttles. _By the goddess..._ she thought numbly, her eyes wide as she gazed at the remains of what was once the centre of Galactic power. _Reaper forces must have been relentless in their efforts to subdue the population_. Crumbled, blackened buildings, streets lined with rubble, piles of mangled bodies... It was hard to reconcile the images she was seeing with her memories of the last time she had been on the Citadel before it was taken. Such widespread devastation on such a scale... even the chaos of the wards was never anywhere near comparable to this level of destruction and death.

The shuttle circled lower, landing as near to the Search and Rescue base of operations as possible. They were to begin assisting the teams already stationed here immediately, in whatever areas they were needed most. She knew from comm chatter and messages from her agents that the rescue teams had been scouring the remains of the Citadel tirelessly for Shepard and other survivors before the Normandy had docked in the hastily repaired bay, and that reports had already been coming in. Mostly they had been negative; tallies of the piles of torn and discarded bodies, notes of any identifying features to assist in compiling a full list of the dead. But sometimes, miraculously, someone was found alive; an asari consort who had barricaded herself into an apartment in Shin Akiba; a turian pulled from the wreckage of a crashed skycar in Zakera ward; a family of drell found sheltering in the Keeper tunnels; a small gang of duct rat children from several species discovered hiding in the vents. No humans, and no sign of Shepard, not yet, but... that even this handful of survivors existed made Liara believe she still had cause to hope. As soon as docking procedures were complete, the entire Normandy crew joined in the search on the Presidium Ring; Shepard's last known location, deployed in shuttles to various likely areas. Doctor Chakwas had half-heartedly cautioned Liara against participating, telling her she really needed time to let her injuries recover, but she seemed to know her advice would go unheeded. Liara refused point blank to stay on board. Though it had taken them less than the expected forty-six hours to reach Earth, thanks in large part to the tireless efforts of the Normandy's engineers and the resident quarian technical genius pushing the FTL drive well beyond its limits, there was still only a very small window of time before the hope of finding Shepard alive turned from fragile to nonexistent. Much of the Citadel's arms were being covered by the surviving ground forces from Earth, but the Presidium Ring was where the damage and debris were most concentrated, meaning that progress in that sector was agonisingly slow. It was also the most likely place to find Shepard, so that's where they would go. And considering the size of the Presidium alone, every able body was needed in the search. And even if they weren't, Liara was damned if she was going to lie in the med bay while Shepard was lost in the chaos.

'Alright, here we are,' Cortez said as the shuttle touched down, turning in his seat to look at his passengers, blue eyes lit with grim determination, and not a little hope. 'Go find her.'

'God willing,' Liara heard Ashley murmur quietly beside her, half in answer, half in prayer. 'If the skipper's in this section, we'll bring her back, safe and sound,' she said louder for Cortez's benefit. 'My word on it.'

'And mine,' Samantha put in from Liara's other side. 'Even if all I'm doing is helping to regulate and recalibrate the new comm-buoy systems.'

'Don't downplay the importance of calibrations,' Garrus chastened her gently from his seat beside Tali on the shuttle's other side, his tone a brave but half-hearted attempt at jocularity. 'It's more important than most people give credit for.'

'I gotta get back to the Normandy to fly James, EDI and the Prothean to search Sector Five, and take whoever else can assist out to Sector Two to help Wrex and his men,' Cortez said, returning his attention to the flight instruments. 'Good luck out there.'

Liara remained silent as the hatch opened onto the debris-covered ruin that was once the Presidium, unable to summon anything more than a nod of farewell to Cortez as she stepped out of the shuttle. Her mind was almost entirely consumed with the need begin searching, to work, to do... something. Find Shepard. That was the only thing she could think of, the only thing that was important. She looked around as the Kodiak took off, distantly taking note of her surroundings. There was no need for a breather mask, since the life support systems and environmental shields appeared to be functioning well enough for the moment, but there was no artificial sunlight, no blue sky over their heads. Only the cold vacuum of space above, and the near-total devastation around them; the torn and broken remains of the once proud and beautiful seat of galactic government. And Shepard was lost out there, somewhere, trapped in the wreckage. Alone, wounded, maybe… maybe dying, or…

Liara shook her head almost violently to dispel such self-defeating thinking. _Goddess, no. Don't think that way. She is alive, and we will find her._

_We will find you, Shepard. That's my promise. I'm coming._

They picked their way swiftly but carefully over to where the S&R ops base was located in the remains of the most intact building left standing, which could have been an apartment block at one point from the singed, torn and otherwise ruined furniture strewn about the exterior. A harried-looking soldier came to meet them as they entered and quickly directed them to the search leader in a room on the far side of the building; a tired-looking man approaching middle human years in a battle-worn, Alliance issue hard-suit. He looked up from the grid reference he was examining as they entered, straightening as he took them in with a glance.

'You must be the Normandy crew,' he said as he saluted them.

'Part of it,' Garrus told him.

'Sergeant Robert Matthews', the man introduced himself. 'In charge of rescue operations in this sector.'

'How is the search progressing?' Tali asked, her voice serious, but cautiously hopeful. 'Any survivors?'

'I'm afraid we haven't found anyone alive in this section,' Sergeant Matthews answered, shaking his head grimly. 'The Presidium seems to have suffered the worst of the damage.'

'Any sign of Commander Shepard?' Samantha enquired from somewhere to Liara's left.

Matthews sighed. 'Negative,' he answered. 'Nothing up here. But not finding anything also means there's still hope we'll find her alive.'

'Well, that's better than a shot to the face,' Ash commented, apparently encouraged.

'Sergeant,' Liara spoke up at last, drawing the attention of her squad mates. 'When you said you hadn't found any sign of Shepard 'up here'...?' Her voice tailed away, and the Sergeant gave her his full attention.

'Doctor T'Soni?' he asked.

Liara nodded. His voice was discernibly gentler than it had been a moment ago. Perhaps he knew. Her relationship with Shepard was not a secret precisely, as private as Liara was (and as careful as she had been in keeping that blabbermouth Allers woman out of her quarters), but she hadn't been aware that it was common knowledge among Alliance forces. Thankfully, so far she hadn't been exposed to any overtly negative reactions concerning their involvement. Of course, she should not have been surprised that humanity, indeed, the entire galaxy wanted to know everything they could about their saviour, but... having people she had never even met know such details about her life would take some getting used to. Especially in situations such as this. 'Yes,' she answered quietly.

He gave her a respectful, sympathetic nod. 'I'm sorry. I can only imagine how hard this must be for you. I meant that we haven't found any sign of Shepard on the Citadel, but before we got the call from the Normandy to focus our attention on the Presidium, we had been searching the area around the beam in London, looking for civilians.' He turned away and bent down for a moment, taking something from an equipment crate beside him. 'We found this,' he said, offering the object to Liara, who took it, hands shaking as she saw the distinctive N7 designation on the scuffed, blackened surface.

Shepard's helmet.

Liara held it tightly between her palms as her mind flooded with memories of that night; their last night together in Shepard's quarters, the last night before the nightmare truly began...

* * *

_..._

_Liara gazed fondly at Shepard, watching the human playing idly with the well-used helmet. 'What are you doing?'_

_The Commander stood, turning the piece of armour about in her hands as she examined it for a moment. 'I thought I heard the casing crack during that last fight,' she said, tossing the helmet to Liara, who blinked in surprise but managed to catch it, noting the small grin on Shepard's face as she did so. 'Bullet must have just grazed me,' Shepard said nonchalantly as she sat on the edge of her bed, looking at Liara with a cheeky twinkle in her eyes._

_The asari watched her for a moment, noting the signs of worry and wear in her soldier's face; the faint lines of anxiety at the edges of her eyes; the shadows of exhaustion beneath them, the way her fingers clenched so tightly where they rested on her thighs that her knuckles were white with the strain. The weight of the galaxy was resting on Shepard's shoulders, and no matter how strong she was, that was more than enough to break anyone. Even Shepard, given time. And she had carried this burden for far too long, now... it was far too much for one person to bear alone._

_Liara gazed at her worriedly. 'Do you feel ready, Shepard?' she asked, her voice gentle, knowing the Commander would not really want to enter into such a conversation, as much as she may need to. But after all, it was Shepard who had taught her the value of talking through one's thoughts and feelings rather than repressing them and pretending unconcern. Especially in circumstances such as these._

_The Spectre's smile slipped, and she looked down briefly, then fixed Liara with a warm, slightly challenging gaze. She tilted her head a little, lifting an eyebrow. 'You first,' she countered, her tone allowing no refusal. Not this time._

_Liara gave a soft, surprised laugh. 'Very fair.' After all, hadn't Shepard been trying to convince Liara to stop and talk to her every chance she had since they left Mars? She really should have allowed herself more time to... how had Shepard put it? To take a moment for herself every now and then. And she certainly should have put aside more time for Shepard. There had always been something that seemed far too vital to put off, even for a moment, and so... Goddess, she wished she had given Shepard more of her attention. It was so obvious now that she had needed Liara as much as Liara needed her, and there was so little time to make up for it..._

_Well... it was better to do so now than never at all._

_Liara looked down at the helmet, running her fingers over the smooth, slightly scuffed surface of the hard casing, trying to get her thoughts in order. Was she ready? Did she feel like they could do this? Did it matter? They had to get it done, and now was the time. 'Now or never', as the humans were so fond of saying. Quite aptly. 'What I want most is for this war to end while there's still a galaxy left to save,' Liara said softly as she looked back up at her Commander, who was watching her quietly from the bed. She had... such a troubled look in her eyes. Liara felt her heart clench at the full realisation of just how terribly difficult and wearing this must be for her. 'And everyone's counting on you to do that for us,' the young asari said in a voice filled with care and sympathy, hoping Shepard would take the opening and let herself voice her true fears and concerns just this once, instead of keeping it all inside for the sake of her crew's morale. But tonight, Liara was not here as a member of the crew. She was here for Shepard, and Shepard alone. Her love. 'It must be overwhelming.'_

_The Commander was silent for a brief moment, staring at her hands, then abruptly sighed and looked up at Liara slowly. 'How do you get ready for something like this?' she asked, her voice soft, infused with a note of pleading as some of her insecurities and doubts bled through. There was a bleakness in her eyes; a terrible sadness that nearly broke Liara's heart to see. How much fear and heartache and uncertainty had Shepard been keeping to herself? How much suffering had she borne alone, while Liara had been too absorbed in her work to pay her the attention she deserved and needed? _Oh, goddess, how could I not have seen how bad it was?

_Well, she wouldn't have to bear it alone any longer. Not if Liara had anything to say about it._

_'You cajole, and threaten,' Liara replied, holding Shepard's gaze as she moved to her side. 'And make tremendous sacrifices.' Shepard looked away at that, leaning back on her arms, her expression downcast. _Oh, Shepard..._ Liara placed the helmet to one side and sat close beside her on the bed, meeting Shepard's eyes again, serious and intent. 'Until the galaxy realises it has someone worth following.'_

_Shepard breathed out, looking at Liara with wide, hopeful eyes. 'You think so?'_

_The asari nodded slightly, her answer immediate and unwavering as she lay back beside her. 'There's no doubt in my mind.'_

_Her lover took a deep breath, letting it out with a quiet sound of hesitant acceptance and relief. Liara reached out and gently took Shepard's hand, smiling as the Commander twined her fingers with hers and held on tight. She looked up at the stars through the window above them and sighed wistfully, glancing at Shepard. 'It would be easy for a single ship to get lost up there,' she commented softly, turning her gaze back to the limitless expanse beyond the mass effect field enveloping the ship, which lit up the darkness like flickering blue flames. 'Wouldn't it?'_

_From the corner of her eye, she saw Shepard follow her gaze, saw an answering expression of regretful longing steal over her lovely features. 'Yeah...' she said quietly, stroking her thumb gently over the back of Liara's hand. 'It would.'_

_'To find someplace very far away...' Liara began, letting herself think aloud. Surely somewhere, out there in that vast stretch of darkness studded with diamond light, there was a place the Reapers wouldn't touch. Some small, uninhabited planet they would overlook. Somewhere... safe. 'Where you could spend the rest of your life... in peace...' she finished hesitantly, knowing Shepard would know precisely what she meant. 'And happiness.' Her voice was a hushed murmur of longing. _To live in peace and happiness, with you. No duty, no danger, no fear. Just us, and... and our children. Goddess... above all else, that is what I want.

_She smiled as Shepard pressed a tender kiss to her cheek, watching as the human sat slowly up. 'Mm,' Shepard said softly, her voice warm and loving. 'Right now, there's no place I'd rather be.'_

_Liara sat up too, shifting so that her leg pressed against Shepard's, brushing her hand gently down her arm as the Commander turned toward her. Liara smiled. 'Neither would I.' The tender look her lover gave her in return as she leaned in toward her sent shivers down Liara's spine. She closed her eyes as Shepard's lips found hers, soft and warm and gentle. When the kiss ended, she rested her forehead against Shepard's for a moment, and then pulled back just a little to gaze at her. 'I love you, Shepard,' she said quietly, watching in wonder as Shepard's whole face lit up with sheer joy._

_'I love you too, Liara,' was the gentle, smiling reply._

It was incredible how such a simple little word could have such a profound physical effect on a person,_ Liara thought as her heart skipped a beat at Shepard's soft utterance. She slid her hands about Shepard's waist, her heart racing at the feel of the toned, well defined physique of her courageous soldier, and looked deeply into her beautiful eyes as she leaned in for another kiss. 'Show me,' she whispered._

_And Shepard did. In the touch of her hands on her body, the heat of her mouth on her skin, the warmth of Shepard's love flooding her as they bonded, heart and mind and body and soul united. Given the extreme life or death situation they were about to face, Liara had expected frenzied passion born of desperation from her lover. It wasn't her preference, but she was prepared for it, would have understood completely. But it wasn't like that at all. Shepard let Liara set the pace, let her lead, let her choose, let her begin their union. She accepted what Liara gave her and demanded nothing, treating each kiss, each caress, each intimate touch as an infinitely precious gift. Liara brought her to the edge and held her as she tumbled over, gently stroking her soft, silky hair; a source of endless captivation for the asari. And when Shepard finally took her, it was with loving, tender sweetness, with smiles and quiet laughter, cradling Liara as she whispered Shepard's name, melting into her soldier's strong arms as waves of pleasure shook her body, thoughts and emotions and memories entangled with Shepard's, their souls intertwined. Liara clung to her as the flood of love through their bond threatened to overwhelm her, and Shepard drew Liara close against her side, both marvelling at the touch of the other's mind, at the rapturous feeling of wholeness they felt in the shelter of one another's arms. The young asari let her head rest on Shepard's shoulder, the looming threat of annihilation forgotten for this one precious moment as she felt her love kiss the top of her head, heard the gentle, husky whisper..._

_'I love you more than anything...'_

_Liara felt the proof of the words through their bond, and sent all the strength of her love for Shepard back through their connection, smiling as she heard her lover's delighted gasp, as she felt Shepard's arms tighten about her in response. 'I love you too,' she whispered back. They had said it many times tonight, making up for lost time. Neither of them would ever believe they had said it enough. 'More than anything.'_

_..._

Liara held the helmet to her, swallowing hard as a painful lump formed in her throat, and then looked up at the sergeant, who was watching her with sympathetic eyes.

'We have to find her,' she said, her voice infused with purposeful determination. 'Just tell us where you need us.'

* * *

Shepard's first awareness was of pain.

She awoke to blackness, her eyes open but unseeing, unable to focus; the only thing making her certain she wasn't dead or dreaming was the unimaginable agony coursing through her body, every nerve ending firing with unrelenting torture. She drew in a gasping breath, fighting the urge to let herself black out and escape back down into peaceful, unfeeling oblivion. She focused on the pain, using it to anchor her awareness to her body, knowing that such pain mean that something was wrong, and she needed to take care of it, if possible. But oh, god, the pain... it was... unimaginable. Unbearable. It was torment beyond belief; blinding, searing, excruciating.

She embraced it.

Rather, she forced herself to embrace it. To accept it, channel it, master it as she had been trained to do, conditioned to do. Alliance training taught recruits to view pain as a resource, an informative tool. It taught them caution, showed them their limits, and how far to push to exceed them. Pain was a wonderful thing. It let you know you were alive, told you something needed fixing, and wouldn't let you forget. If you felt pain, you knew your body was still trying, still fighting. Still living. Without pain, no species could survive. Shepard knew this, knew that if the pain went away... then it would be too late. That she was still capable of feeling anything gave her hope. It wasn't pleasant; downright torturous, in fact, and Shepard knew beyond a doubt that she could not survive long without going into shock... or going insane. But for the moment, it was better than the alternative, because now there was a chance that she could keep her promise to Liara. A salarian's chance in a varren pen, but still... to find herself alive, with even the slightest possibility of living on into the future she had fully expected to die for, was something of a shock, but a welcome one. And oh, god, if that wasn't the understatement of the century.

But... why was she alive? That damned AI... the Catalyst... it had said that if she chose to destroy the Reapers, then... she would die too, because... because she was partly synthetic. Didn't it? Shepard frowned, trying to force her pain-fogged mind to remember. It... sure as hell seemed like that was what it was saying. When she destroyed the power conduit and triggered the Crucible to fire, she had known, had accepted, that she would die. The Catalyst had implied as much, even if it hadn't straight out said it.

_Guess it must've been wrong, _Shepard thought absently as her mind struggled to adapt to her body's new and constant state of pain. _Or... or maybe it just didn't want me to destroy the Reapers... and destroy it, too, I suppose... the Reaper god... the Lord of the Reapers..._

Shepard took several deep, controlled breaths as she slowly blinked her eyes, forcing the world gradually back into focus, trying to take stock of her situation as best she could. She made her mind focus on each part of her body in turn, paying close attention to where the pain was the most intense.

_Head throbbing bad, bleeding. Not good. _She felt wetness on the skin of her face, felt a sharp stinging on her left cheek and recognised it as the feel of cold air brushing over an open wound._ Scrape, or… gash, maybe… Right arm strained. Left arm broken. Ribs probably fractured, some cracked, possibly broken. Legs... definitely broken._

Experimentally, she tried to move her fingers, and found they worked. It hurt like hell, but they wiggled, some of them. A little. The others were clearly broken, and she left them alone. Very carefully, she ignored the pain and slightly moved her toes inside her armoured boots, and turned her head slowly side to side.

_Okay. No spinal damage, then. At least, not serious. Could be worse... could be dead... again._

She felt a sensation of coldness spreading through her body; not from exposure but within her veins, and over the surface of her skin, which meant, impossibly, that the microframe computers had to be functioning somehow, despite the beating she had taken and the extensive damage to her hard-suit. The input detectors, woven throughout the layer of ballistic cloth that was all that was left of her armour, were still dispensing medi-gel; sealing the wounds in her flesh against infection, preventing blood loss and numbing some of the pain. She knew she must still be bleeding from areas where her armour was burned completely away, and that was dangerous. The gash on her head concerned her the most; head wounds bled a lot. The way she was lying in the rubble, her head and shoulders were elevated, so it might not get too serious just yet. But most external damage to her limbs and torso were receiving medi-gel... hell, at least this much of a working first-aid system was something.

In this state, sitting up would definitely be pushing it, but... she had to try and see the extent of the damage. Shepard tried to lift herself up a little to see the rest of her body, but she couldn't even get that far. She suddenly became aware of a weight on her stomach and legs. Not crushing, but heavy, immovable. Something was trapping her, holding her down. Her eyes adjusted at last, and she raised her head as high as she could, trying to ignore the pain ignited by the movement, though she couldn't help but cry out at the intensity of it. She gasped air in deeply until it subsided, then tried to see where she was. There was light, from somewhere. Faint, but present, it allowed her to see her surroundings a little. She blinked as small spots of light danced in her eyes, and after a few moments she realised they were stars. That was the source of the light, then. She was buried in rubble, and from what she could see and feel, only her head, chest and shoulders were free. Starlight shone in through gaps in the debris around her, allowing her glimpses of the destruction beyond; shattered glass, collapsed bulkheads, and shredded, tangled wires in haphazard piles of wreckage...

Shepard heard a sound, suddenly; feet scrabbling over rock, scraping on metal. Her mind raced. Someone else was alive, and nearby. Maybe... maybe one of the civilians on board when the Reapers took the station survived, somehow, or... maybe it was one of the humans sent up through the beam just before the assault began, or... even a search party? Was it possible? How long had she been unconscious? She tried to speak, but nothing happened. She tried again, fighting off the accompanying frustration, and this time a small croak emerged.

'H-hello? Anyone... there?'

Silence. Then the scrabbling began again, drawing nearer.

Shepard coughed, the effort of speaking almost too much for her to manage. 'Here... please...'

Her head turned as she saw a flash of movement, and a green, multi-legged body came into view through a gap in the rubble, accompanied by the clicking of insectoid limbs, clambering over the mound of debris above her. Shepard felt her hope drain away.

It was just a Keeper.

It paused, its bulging, swivelling eyes sweeping over her indifferently where she lay trapped beneath the rubble, then proceeded to ignore her presence completely, moving over the piles of debris and out of sight in pursuit of whatever mindless task it was compelled to do, clearly already engaged in rebuilding the damage to the station. That was their sole function, after all, programmed into them countless millennia ago by the Reapers. Their purpose was only to maintain the Citadel itself; the people inhabiting it were not the Keeper's concern. They were non-sentient and utterly indifferent; she'd get no help from them.

Her vision swam, and she let her head fall back against the cold slab of concrete beneath her, feeling the darkness rise, ready to swallow her again. She knew she couldn't fight it long, but she resisted as long as she could. She had to... to think...

So. She was definitely still on the Citadel; she had to be, if there were Keepers. And if there were Keepers, then the artificial atmosphere was still functioning, at least in the section she was in. Which would be why she had air. Of course, if she was still on the Presidium Ring, that would account for it; after Sovereign's attack, state-of-the-art backup systems had been installed to route all emergency power from the arms to the Presidium's environmental shields, which naturally were given the highest priority. Protecting the damned elite first and foremost, as usual. In a way, she probably had the mindless green bugs to thank for her life; they had to be the ones responsible for making sure those systems functioned. After all, the Keepers couldn't do their jobs without life-support. That was the extent of the assistance she'd receive from them, though.

Right. If she wasn't going to be helped, then she would have to help herself.

_Think. What can you do? There's gotta be a way... there's _always_ a way..._

She needed... she needed to call for help, to let someone know where she was, that she was alive. But... she couldn't raise her arms; there was no way she could get to her omni-tool to try and transmit a call for help. If it was even still working. She hadn't been able to get a signal from it since right after the last time Hackett had contacted her, since she found herself at the feet of the ghostly AI. She couldn't move, couldn't call for help. There was nothing she could do but wait here to die, wait until she went into shock and slipped away, or until the weight of the rubble slowly suffocated her, or until her body shut down from dehydration and blood loss...

_'Oh, no you don't, Commander. Don't you give up now.'_

Anderson? But... he was... dead. She was so sure she'd heard his voice... hallucinating already; that was a bad sign...

_'Don't think that way,' Anderson's voice chided gently in her mind. 'You don't get to bow out just yet. The fight's over, sure, but you're still needed. Hold on, Shepard.'_

He was dead, she knew that. This was just a ghost of memory, a comfort-seeking response from her overwrought mind...

_'Hold on, child...'_

The voice did comfort her, somehow, even as it tore at the all-too-fresh wound left by the death of her captain, her mentor... her friend.

_Anderson..._

* * *

...

'_Anderson?' Shepard stumbled to his side and sat down carefully beside him where he leaned against the hub in the centre of the strange control room, suppressing a gasp as her body screamed at even this slight movement. 'We did it, sir.'_

'_Yes. We did. We both did.' He took a deep breath, eyes on the green and blue planet far below them. 'It's... quite a view.'_

_Shepard coughed out a small laugh. 'Best seats in the house,' she joked wearily._

_Anderson gave her a tired smile. 'God. Feels like years since I just sat down.'_

'_Th…' The Commander paused as a stab of pain in her side stole her breath. 'Think you earned a rest,' she managed after a moment._

_They spent a moment in contemplative silence, drinking in the sight of their war-torn homeworld. It would not remain under siege for long, once the Crucible took down the Reapers._

'_You ever wonder how things… would have been different?' Anderson said suddenly, his voice quietly reflective and wistful. 'How our lives would be different… if this hadn't happened?' Shepard glanced at him, surprised by his pensive words and brooding tone. Anderson looked back at his protégée, regret in his eyes. 'I never had… a family, Shepard. Never had children.'_

'_There'll be… time enough for that now…' Shepard reminded him. 'With... with Kahlee.'_

_Anderson chuckled softly. 'I... I think that ship has sailed.' He breathed out slowly as he pressed a hand to the freely bleeding gunshot wound in his side. Shepard winced as she watched him, knowing her guilt was irrational, that she tried as hard as she could to resist the Illusive Man's compelling command of her body, that she couldn't have stopped him forcing her to shoot Anderson. It still hurt regardless, knowing it was her finger that pulled the trigger..._

'_What about you?' Anderson asked, breaking her out of her self-damning thoughts. 'Ever think about settling down?'_

_Oh, yes. She did. Thoughts flashed before her eyes at his gentle question, all her hopes, her desires, her most secret dreams... Liara, children, a family, a life... God, she thought about it constantly._

_Constantly._

'_Yeah,' Shepard said quietly as tears of regret pricked beneath her eyelashes. _Oh… Liara…_ 'I like the sound of that.' She forced her words past the rising lump in her throat. There was… there was still a chance that a shuttle could make it to them for extraction before the weapon fired… still a chance for those little blue children… 'Not sure… I'd be much... good at it, though...'_

'_Sure you would,' Anderson assured her, reaching out and patting her hand gently. 'I think you'd make a great mother.'_

_Shepard smiled sadly. 'Uh-huh.'_

'_Think how proud your kids would be...' the admiral continued affectionately. 'Telling everyone their... their mom is Commander Shepard...'_

_The Commander looked down. 'I... don't know about that...' she said quietly. 'Not everything I've done is... something to be proud of...'_

_Anderson pressed her fingers, and she looked up to find him smiling at her fondly. '_I'm_ proud of you,' he told her simply. 'You did good, child. You did... good...'_

_Shepard bit her lip, the note of fatherly pride in his voice touching her heart. 'Thank you, sir...'_

_Anderson gave a soft sigh deep in his throat, a sound of contented acceptance, and then was silent. Shepard felt his hand slip from hers, and looked at him worriedly, feeling her anxiety mount as his eyes closed, his head dropping down onto his chest._

No... not now.. not after all this...

_'Anderson... stay with me...' she pleaded, her voice rough-edged, broken. It was getting... harder to breathe... Anderson wasn't... wasn't breathing... 'We're almost through this.' _Please..._ He didn't respond, didn't move._

_'... Anderson?'_

_..._

* * *

_Anderson..._

Shepard closed her eyes tightly, the grief and pain in her body and soul too much for her to bear. She knew he was gone, but somehow... she just couldn't accept it. The stalwart soldier, leader of Earth's resistance, survivor of so many battles, just... to die like that, before he even saw the end of the Reapers... bleeding out from a bullet she hadn't been able to stop... that she had inflicted...

She couldn't... couldn't bear to think about it anymore...

She let her thoughts drift away, slipping into unconsciousness, escaping her memories and body into numbing, peaceful oblivion.

* * *

'Whoa, doc!'

Ashley caught Liara around the waist as the asari lost her footing on a loose piece of fractured concrete. Liara took a deep breath as Ashley set her carefully back on her feet, fighting back a wave of dizziness, and then straightened, ignoring the stabbing pain in her side, the lingering legacy of her still-healing ribs. She gave Ashley a grateful nod, and turned back once more to her survey of the sector they were searching; an unfamiliar part of the Presidium ring. It did not appear to have been used for habitation; the wreckage seemed to be comprised mostly of technical equipment and rough bulkheads. This was not a place designed to be seen; it lacked the elegant aesthetics and graceful lines of all the inhabitable areas of the Presidium. Vaguely, Liara wondered what the function of such a place might have been.

'You sure you're up to this, Liara?' the Lieutenant-Commander asked, somewhat hesitantly, keeping pace with Liara as they continued climbing over the rubble, following the grid set out in their omni-tools to ensure no corner of the section was overlooked.

The asari nodded. 'I'm fine, Ashley. Thank you,' she replied absently, keeping her eyes trained on her omni-tool scan as the biometric sensors searched for signs of life in the area. Liara had programmed it to consider humans and other higher life forms as a priority, though all it was currently picking up was Keepers, of which there was still a significant number in every section, already focused on repairing the damage. In some areas, they had been inadvertently helpful in clearing away excess rubble which assisted the Search and Rescue ops in rescuing more survivors. There seemed to be less in this section, though she had seen some scurrying about. No signs of other life as of yet, however; not even more than a handful of dead bodies. There had also been no sign of Shepard. If they didn't find her soon...

She raised her hand and opened the comm-link channel to the other searchers, all spread out over opposite corners of the sector. 'Garrus, Tali? Anything?'

'Nothing yet.' A poorly concealed note of weary, sympathetic patience suffused the two-toned turian voice on the other end of the comm.

'You know we would have told you if we found anything, Liara,' Tali put in gently.

Liara sighed, noting the concerned look Ashley flashed her at the clear misery in the sound. 'I know. I just... surely by now we would have-'

'Found something!' The unfamiliar voice of one of the Alliance rescue crew members in another search quarter crackled loudly over the comm channel.

'A survivor?' Ash asked eagerly.

'Negative,' the soldier answered grimly. 'A body. Nearly tripped over it, it's half buried in the rubble. Looks human, gotta shift some rubble before we can get to it, though...'

_A... body?_

Liara felt her heart constrict in dread. 'Is it...' she began, and then fell silent, unable to voice the question, though he seemed to know what she was asking.

'One second...'

She waited as her terror mounted, listening to the sounds of shifting rubble through the comm-link, unable to breathe with the strength of her fear. Fortunately, she didn't have long to suffer.

'God...' the soldier answered after a few moments. 'It's... it's the admiral. It's Anderson.'

_Goddess..._

'We can confirm his death, then,' Garrus said, his tone quiet with respect.

Ash sighed heavily. 'At least we have his body. He deserves a hero's funeral.'

Liara closed her eyes and breathed out as a surge of cautious relief flooded through her, followed by a sharp spike of accompanying guilt. But it wasn't that she was in any way happy that it was Anderson's body the soldier had uncovered, she was only relieved it wasn't her Shepard. She tried to suppress the treacherous, nagging thoughts that kept telling her how unlikely it was that they would find her in time... or at all... concentrating instead on the information the discovery of Anderson's body provided. As disheartening as it was to have found the undeniable proof of the demise of such a great man, finding him in this section made it far more likely they would find Shepard here, or somewhere nearby. Biometric scans indicated that she had been with him when he died; and the weapon had fired scant minutes after sensors reported his death. Wherever she went in that time, she could not have gone far.

She had to be close...

'Come on,' she said to Ash, raising her arm to shine her omni-tool's flashlight over the chaotic, broken terrain, pressing on over the wreckage with renewed urgency. 'We have to keep looking!'

* * *

Shepard couldn't tell if she was dreaming...

She felt the cold... felt the pain... but to her, that merely seemed to be her natural state, now, waking and unconscious, so... she could not decide from sensation alone.

She saw the billowing flames as ship after ship exploded against a backdrop of gunfire and glittering stars. Heard the voice... the emotionless, autonomous, yet achingly familiar voice... the chilling words of an ancient synthetic intelligence on the ghostly lips of a long dead child... how could it be a dream?

It was a dream_,_ she realised, and yet... it wasn't_._ She hadn't been dreaming, not then. It was real. This was a memory she was dreaming of now... true, undeniable, yet impossible...

Unbelievable...

* * *

_..._

_This... this was the Catalyst?_

_She stood before the ephemeral ghostly form, forcing her broken, beaten body to obey her, forcing her mind to work, to think. This... this was so surreal... Shepard closed her eyes briefly as she tried to understand. 'You said...' Her voice faltered for a moment, the effort of speaking becoming almost too much for her damaged body to handle. She breathed deeply and mastered the pain. 'You're the Catalyst, but... what are you?'_

_'A construct,' the... thing answered, its tone monotonous, detached. 'An intelligence designed eons ago to solve a problem. I was created to bring balance. To be the catalyst for peace between organics and synthetics.'_

Well... good job._ Shepard's breath hitched sharply in her throat as a humourless laugh threatened to burst from her. 'So you're just an AI.'_

_The image of the dead child narrowed its eyes at her slightly. 'In as much as you are just an animal. I embody the collective intelligence of all Reapers.'_

_This thing was... the driving force behind the Reapers? But... it... 'Why do you... look like that?' she asked it. 'You... you look just like... you even sound like... but...' She swayed where she stood, exhausted mind and body, but still trying desperately to make sense of this. 'I saw him die...' she whispered._

_The spectral projection fixed her in a level gaze. 'I scanned your memories,' it informed her unhelpfully._

_Shepard shook her head a little in confusion. What the hell did that mean? How could it do that? 'My... memories?'_

_It nodded once in confirmation. 'The cybernetic implants located in the hippocampus of your medial temporal lobe.'_

The... the what?_ Cybernetic implants in her... her brain... that had to mean..._

_'The... Cerberus implants?' Shepard asked._

_'Yes,' the AI stated. 'Integrated with your system during your reconstruction.'_

_Shepard felt her eyes widen incredulously as it spoke. 'How do you know about that?' she demanded._

_'The Reapers know of you. So I know of you. The Reapers have gathered intelligence on you from many sources, including the organisation known as Cerberus. The implant in your medial lobe records and processes information and images as your memories form. I can interpret them,' the Catalyst explained. 'It is similar in effect to the ability of the Reapers to access the minds of organics, though such a process takes a significant period of exposure to the indoctrination signal. The implants appear to fuction as a bypass. I cannot influence you, but I can access surface thoughts and memories.' It gestured, indicating its small, pale form. 'This image is prevalent in your mind. I wished to present you with familiarity. Perhaps even a form of comfort. You wish that you could see this child alive. You wish that he had not died. I wish to impress upon you that he need not have died in vain.' It paused. 'Not if you choose correctly.'_

_Shepard let that last remark pass her by for the moment as she stared at it, trying to wrap her mind around what she had just been told. It couldn't control her, but... it could see into her mind... 'This boy is... what I think about most?'_

_The 'child' shook its head in a firm negative. 'No. The image of this organic is foremost in your memories.' The AI changed from human to asari in the blink of an eye, gazing at Shepard with a blank, dead expression, speaking with a distorted approximation of Liara's gentle voice. 'I could continue to represent myself in this form, if you wish.'_

_Shepard turned her head away, pained by the image. This thing was _not_ Liara. 'No. Stop.'_

_'I anticipated you would react in this way,' the AI said, assuming the appearance of the dead child once again. 'It was likely to be most disturbing to you.'_

_'You... you got that right,' Shepard growled weakly. 'Why not just tell me that in the first place?'_

_The ghostly image paused, tilting its head slightly as it looked up at her, blinking. God knew why it had reason to blink. 'I did not anticipate that it would require explanation,' it said after a moment._

Obviously._ The Commander shook her head, incredulous. 'What, you thought... thought I'd just figure out the deep and meaningful symbolism on my own?' she asked derisively, trying not to raise her gashed eyebrow in scorn. 'I've got... other things on my mind right now.'_

_The AI gave a short nod. 'Precisely. I did not think it was significant.'_

Would have been nice to know anyway, _Shepard raged internally. _I'd have been less confused and distracted from what you were trying to tell me, you stupid machine._ She kept in inside herself, however, lacking the strength or enthusiasm to continue the argument. And as she said, there were other things she had to worry about_. _'We organics like to just be told some things.'_

_The Catalyst surveyed her calmly. 'That is evident,' it stated without emotion._

_Shepard bit back an angry retort. There were more important things to focus on now. She wanted to know just what this thing really was. If it would deign to answer. 'You said you were created.'_

_'Correct,' the AI answered succinctly, apparently choosing to disregard her implied question._

_She felt her jaw tighten at its reticence. 'By who?' She knew the answer to some extent already, of course, although she did not know the true name of the remnants of that strange colossal marine race hidden beneath the oceans of Despoina; the self-proclaimed organic creators of the synthetic horrors now terrorising the galaxy once more. She wanted to test how well the Catalyst truly knew her mind and past movements, and just how much truth it was prepared to divulge._

_'By ones who recognised that conflict would always arise between synthetics and organics,' the Catalyst replied, looking up at the Commander with a dispassionate gaze. It turned to look out at the battle surrounding them. 'I was first created to oversee the relations between synthetic and organic life. To establish a connection. But our efforts always ended in conflict. So a new solution was required.'_

_Shepard followed its gaze, watching as one of the great, squid-like metal monsters drifted silently by, casually destroying a turian frigate in passing. 'The Reapers?'_

_The shimmering shade of the dead boy nodded again. 'Precisely.'_

_Another short, unspecific answer. So it was still determined to remain evasive. 'I met your creators,' Shepard informed the ephemeral projection bluntly. 'They told me what you did to them.'_

_The Catalyst showed no surprise, though the Commander was not entirely certain that it was capable of such emotion. 'We did as we were expected.'_

_'They said you betrayed them,' she pressed. 'That you turned them into Harbinger.'_

_'When they asked that I solve the problem of conflict, they failed to understand that they were part of the problem themselves,' the AI replied. Shepard noted that it did not deny her assertion. 'The flaws of their organic reasoning could not perceive this. They lacked the foresight to understand that their destruction was part of the very solution they required.'_

_'Well,' Shepard said, unable to keep a small trace of satisfaction from her voice at the thought of the Reapers' first victims surviving to join the final fight against them. In whatever small way they were able to use their sapient-controlling artifacts to contribute to the cause. 'They've joined this war now.'_

_'And I welcome their involvement,' the ghostly AI stated, completely unmoved and untroubled by her declaration. 'I am only facilitating their request.'_

_Shepard shook her head in confusion. But the Reapers were responsible for continuous conflict, every fifty millennia, an endless cycle of chaos and destruction. Organised chaos, perhaps, but conflict nonetheless. How could the Catalyst consider them a solution to its masters' request? She had to know how and why, had to try and understand how its contradictory logic worked. She needed more. 'Where did the Reapers come from? Did you create them?'_

_'My creators gave them form. I gave them function. They in turn give me purpose,' The AI projection answered, looking at a pair of Reaper dreadnoughts gliding past towards a small knot of Alliance fighters. Shepard turned her head away. They wouldn't stand a chance. 'The Reapers are a synthetic representation of my creators.'_

_'The Leviathan...?' the Commander half-asked, half-stated, glancing up as another Reaper slid through the starry expanse above her head._

_'That is the name you know them by, yes. They became the first true Reaper,' was the disinterested reply. 'Harbinger. They did not approve. But it was the only solution.'_

_Shepard clenched her jaw. God, was she sick of hearing that. 'You said that before,' she reminded it, closing her eyes briefly as a dizzying spell of pain threatened to overwhelm her. 'But how do the Reapers solve anything?'_

_'Organics create synthetics to improve their own existence, but those improvements have limits,' the ghostly projection explained in its child-like voice, shifting subtly from foot to foot as it gazed up at her. To Shepard, it was the very image of a child trying to explain why its misbehaviour was really a good thing. 'To exceed those limits, synthetics must be allowed to evolve. They must, by definition, surpass their creators. The result is conflict; destruction, chaos. It is inevitable. Reapers harvest all life; organic and synthetic, preserving them before they are forever lost to this conflict.'_

_What? 'How is _this_ not conflict?' Shepard challenged the AI angrily, gesturing at the chaos of war and death littering the sky around them as they spoke. 'The Reapers ensure perpetual destruction and chaos, that's all they do! Nothing you've told me contradicts that, it only enforces it! We're at war with the Reapers right now!'_

_'You may be in conflict with the Reapers, but they are not interested in war,' the Catalyst said dismissively, turning its gaze from her._

_The Commander scoffed derisively. 'I find that hard to believe,' she muttered, her voice dark and laced with bitterness._

_The Catalyst faced her again, its posture almost challenging and defensive. 'When fire burns, is it at war? Is it in conflict? Or is it simply doing what it was created to do? We are no different. We harvest your bodies, your knowledge, your creations. We preserve it, to be reborn in the form of a new Reaper. Like a cleansing fire, we restore balance. New life, both organic and synthetic, can once again flourish.'_

_It sounded blank and detached, still, but its words and its logic seemed nothing short of insane to the Commander. Perhaps it _was_ insane. She could see no reason why an artificial intelligence couldn't lose its mind and become entangled in twisted logic, especially without any sort of tempering ability to experience the synthetic equivalent of emotion, which this being apparently lacked. A range of possible responses to its convoluted logic cycled through Shepard's mind; angry, and derisive threats; weary, patiently diplomatic arguments... In the end she decided to hold off and ask another question, intent on finding out as much information as she could from this synthetic being. Sane, or otherwise. 'What do you know about the Crucible?'_

_'The device you refer to as the Crucible is little more than a power source,' it replied, turning to direct its gaze at the great beam of energy sparking between the Citadel and the Crucible. 'However, in combination with the Citadel and the relays, it is capable of releasing tremendous amounts of energy throughout the galaxy. It is crude, but effective and adaptive in its design.'_

_'Who designed it?' Shepard pressed._

_The Catalyst looked up at her impassively. 'You would not know them, and there is not enough time to explain.'_

_Shepard felt like shooting the thing right between the eyes. Or maybe hurling her gun across the platform in frustration. A name, a simple explanation. That's all she wanted. The damned AI could have made something up, she'd never have known. She would have just appreciated knowing the name of the race that first decided to fight back, if only to honour them for their courage. And to get some damn closure on the subject._

_She kept listening tiredly as the thing told her it had decided its 'solution' for peace would no longer work, and that because she had altered the variables and created new possibilities by connecting the Crucible to the Catalyst, she would have to decide upon and initiate a new solution. She asked more questions, received more incomplete, inadequate answers, argued a little more, but in the end, no matter what she said, it all came down to this. She had to choose between seizing control of the Reapers, fusing synthetic and organic life into one race... or destroying synthetic life. If she believed the Catalyst... all synthetic life. It would likely even mean the end of her own life..._

_But... what choice did she truly have?_

_She could not control the Reapers, no matter the Catalyst's claims that she alone would be able to. What if she couldn't? What if she one day lost her grip over the Reapers? Or what if, once she ceased to be organic, her motives and logical processes changed, and she - or whatever she would become - twisted into the same way of thinking as the Catalyst AI freely admitted to, and decided to start the cycle all over again? No. Too many unknowns, too much risk. She found herself remembering Javik's words to her;_

'Subjugating the Reapers will not bring victory. Only extinction will.'

_If little else, she agreed with him on that point, and her views had not changed. Nor could she convert every living being in the galaxy into something different, without their knowledge or choice. Creating, in effect, a single 'perfect' hybrid of organic and synthetic life throughout the galaxy would destroy all diversity, all impetus for change, for growth. What the Catalyst called perfection, Shepard called stagnation. Unacceptable. It wasn't an option._

_Only the ultimate destruction of the threat would assure the galaxy's safety throughout the future cycles._

_Only extinction..._

_She remembered the expression on EDI's face when she told Shepard that because of her, she finally felt alive. Remembered the sound of Legion's voice as he called himself 'I' instead of 'we', becoming a single, whole person in the moment before his death, sacrificing himself to bring true synthetic life to his people..._

Oh, god...

_She drew in a painful breath as she made her last, most agonising decision, turning slowly to fix the Catalyst with a cold, tired glare. 'Let's get this over with...'_

_It gazed indifferently back. 'Do what you must.'_

_..._

* * *

The dream fled, and she opened her eyes to the shadows. Trapped, alone. Wounded.

Dying.

She felt her life beginning to slip away faster, felt her body begin to fail, and she knew. Accepted again. She drew in a painful breath of air and lost most of it to the wrenching cry of agony the simple act tore from her throat. She pushed away the pain and inhaled again, slow and deep, her efforts becoming steadily more laboured with every breath.

_Ribs... ribs must be broken, after all..._ she thought vaguely. She coughed, and tasted blood. _God..._ That, and her laboured breathing probably meant a punctured lung. So... so this was how she was going to go out, then. Drowning slowly in her own blood.

Not long, now...

She tried not to give up. She fought for every moment of life she had left, every breath, every heartbeat. She no longer believed she was going to make it, not truly, but... she couldn't leave Liara, knowing that she hadn't fought to keep her promise with every fibre of her being. She clung to her every memory of Liara, every remembered touch, every hushed whisper, every moment they had had together. She saw the last moment of peace in her mind again, and this time she let it flood her senses, caught and held it tightly, cherishing the memory of the last precious union of their hearts, their minds, their souls...

* * *

_..._

_'I do have... one thing for you, Shepard,' Liara said, turning towards the Commander, arms at her sides. She looked down, almost shyly, before she hesitantly met her lover's gaze. 'A gift. It... will only take a moment... if you want it.'_

_Shepard tilted her head slightly. 'What kind of gift?'_

_'Do you remember when I first joined my consciousness to yours?' Liara asked, her voice soft, and slightly unsure. Shepard merely smiled lovingly in response. Of course she remembered. How could she forget? Liara saw the look in her eyes and smiled back, encouraged. 'I can show you some of my own memories. Asari exchange them sometimes, with friends or...' Liara held her breath for the briefest moment, her mouth curving fondly as she looked into Shepard's eyes. 'Their bond-mates.' Shepard felt her heart miss a beat. 'In some ways, it is... an even deeper connection that than... than anything I have shown you before now,' Liara continued softly. 'I can show you true, complete memories, not just the flashes of thought experienced during a normal meld. It's a gift of trust, and... of love.' She hesitated, glancing down briefly. 'It... can also be a way to say... farewell.'_

_Countless reassurances leapt to Shepard's lips as Liara raised her eyes to look at her once more, but she held them back, feeling instinctively that they would only ring hollow should she voice them now, in this moment. This was not the time for empty platitudes. She held Liara's captivating gaze steadily, and nodded once. 'Show me,' she said quietly._

_Liara stepped in close to Shepard's body, placing one small gloved hand on her shoulder. 'Close your eyes,' she whispered, as her own eyes grew dark._

_Shepard obeyed, lowering her head, and suddenly she could see the beautiful asari behind her closed eyes, within her mind. Inside her heart. It was as though they stood in a field of stars, bright little pinpricks of thoughts and feelings and memories weaving about them in a joyful, intricate dance. She felt her breathing quicken with wonder as her sweet asari smiled, and Shepard could feel Liara's love mingling with her own. She took Liara in her arms as a brilliant light lit the horizon, drawing her into a long, sweet kiss as the bright flood of memories swept over them..._

_... She saw through the eyes of a tiny child as she played, sitting on the grass in an unfamiliar park filled with alien beauty, digging in the ground for ancient ruins. Saw flashes of Benezia, laughing with her daughter, saw a mother's proud smile gracing the Matriarch's normally austere features as Liara received her doctorate from the University of Thessia. She felt Liara's excitement as she explored the Prothean ruins on Therum, felt her mounting terror at the arrival of the geth and her accidental entrapment in the ancient security stasis field. Shepard saw herself as she freed Liara from the stasis bubble, as she defended her from the indoctrinated krogan battlemaster and his squad of geth. She had looked so brave to the young asari, so strong, so courageous, so self-assured. So beautiful. More of Liara's memories flooded her, one after the other; every one of Shepard, seen through Liara's eyes. Her caring, her kindness, her smiles, her courage. How tender she was with Liara, in all their time together. How she made Liara feel so safe, so wanted, so loved..._

* * *

_..._

_Oh, Liara..._

Shepard lost herself to the memories, letting their warmth and light embrace her weary soul, let them soothe her, fill her, calm her, cradle her...

... somewhere, distantly, she felt her body failing... inexorably... inescapably... and she was glad... glad as she slipped into the waiting darkness...

... glad that the last thoughts... she would ever... ever have... were of...

... of...

_... Liara..._

* * *

'The environmental shields in this sector are failing.' Tali's voice, even more distorted over the cracking comm-link, was filled with urgency. 'The Keepers seem to be abandoning this area. I guess they can't keep the life support systems here going right now.'

Liara shared an anxious glance with Ash before replying, fear combined with desperation making her words come out harsher than intended. 'We can't leave. If she's here, and the shields drop, she'll... Just keep looking!'

'Liara-' Garrus began, but Liara spoke over the top of him, too frantic to listen.

'We have to find her, Garrus!' she called over the comm. 'Keep searching! I'm not leaving this sector until we've covered every inch!'

'Of course we're not leaving either, Liara,' Tali said before Garrus could reply. 'We only meant to warn you. Keep your breathing mask ready.'

Ash squeezed Liara's arm soothingly, and the asari sighed, forcing herself to be calm. 'Thank you, Tali,' she said, her tone softer. 'I apologise. Though if we don't find her before the oxygen fails...'

'We'll get this section covered, Liara,' Garrus assured her. 'We'll find her, or we'll...' he paused. 'We'll know she's somewhere else,' he finished, rather awkwardly, his attempt to find a positive alternative falling flat.

Liara appreciated the effort, though his words were less than encouraging. They had been searching for too long, there was so little time left until they could no longer cling to the hope that they might find Shepard alive...

'Hey Ash, you read?' James' gravelly voice suddenly rang out over the comm channel, startling both women.

'Loud and clear, big guy,' Ash replied, a poorly hidden note of fondness in her voice. 'Whatcha got?'

They could almost hear Vega shrug over the link. 'Nothin' bad, nothin' good. We're done in Sector Five. Found squat. Heading to help in Sector Two, but...'

'Reports from Wrex indicate that Sector Two is already almost complete,' EDI reported when James trailed away. 'Specialist Traynor reports only one discovery of survivors recorded in that section; a group of volus and salarian accountants who apparently sealed themselves in their bank vault with provisions when the Citadel was captured. They appear unharmed, but there have been no other reports.'

'No humans,' Javik put in. 'If the Commander is here, then she walks among the ghosts.'

'Seriously, Prothean,' Ash said angrily, glancing at Liara, who had made a small sound of distress at his words. 'Not helpful.'

A moment of silence on the comm, then; 'My apologies, Liara asari,' Javik said, sounding genuinely remorseful. 'The sayings of my people are often misinterpreted in this cycle. I meant only to say we have not found her here. But neither have we found her corpse. She may yet be alive... elsewhere.'

The comm channel abruptly closed, though Liara was certain she heard both James and EDI starting to admonish Javik for his ill-chosen words before the audio link cut out. She valued their concern, of course, but it wasn't necessary. She did not find the Prothean's attempts at reassurance particularly comforting herself, certainly, but at least he was no longer telling her to accept that Shepard was more likely to be dead than anything else. And she appreciated that he was still assisting in the search, however doomed he believed it to be.

Tali's excited voice broke into Liara's thoughts, her volume causing the link to crackle with static. 'Wait!'

Liara's heart leapt. 'Tali? Did you find something?'

'I... I think, maybe...' the quarian answered distractedly. 'I'm just receiving a scan... I set Chiktikka- ah, my combat drone - to search areas of rubble we can't get into, and its sensors are picking up a weak bio-signal a few metres away. It's unstable, but it's human. Can't get a location lock... hang on...'

Liara felt her breath catch in her throat, saw Ash shifting impatiently beside her as they both waited for Tali to complete her bio-scan.

'Got it!' Tali announced triumphantly. 'It's... Keelah, it is! It's Shepard, Liara, it's Shepard!'

_Shepard..._ Liara almost didn't dare to hope. 'Tali, you're sure?'

'Yes, the scan is a match,' the quarian confirmed joyfully. 'She's alive!'

'Where is she?' Liara heard Garrus demand over the comm.

'She's close, just over there. Follow the drone!'

The comm-link stayed open, and Liara and Ash heard frantic sounds of movement as Tali and Garrus struggled over the rubble.

'Alright, we've reached her position now,' Garrus transmitted. 'There's a big pile of wreckage here... Spirits, she's caught under the rubble. Can just make her out... she's unconscious, unresponsive. Doesn't look good. We need to shift this mess to get to her.'

_It was Shepard. Shepard was alive._

_She's alive..._

'Power to the environmental shields is dropping rapidly,' Tali put in urgently. 'We need to hurry!'

'Send us your co-ordinates!' Liara said urgently. Shepard... Shepard was trapped, hurt, she had to get to her!

'Transmitting now,' Tali told her, and a moment later a NavPoint appeared on Liara's omni-tool grid map, indicating a position a few hundred metres to their left. Liara set off immediately over the rubble, moving as fast as she could, using her biotics to help wherever possible; lifting herself over obstacles or moving loose debris out of her path, Ash following in her wake. They heard Garrus grunting as he set to work moving the rubble trapping Shepard, heard Tali sending a transmission to the S&R Operations Base for help.

'Tali'Zorah to Base, do you read?'

'We read you, Tali'Zorah. Status?'

'We've got a trapped survivor here in need of medical attention. Requesting immediate assistance and evac at these co-ordinates. The environmental shields in this sector are failing.'

'Copy that. Sending a medical extraction team to your co-ordinates ASAP. Over.'

A few more precious minutes spent struggling over the wreckage and Liara saw Tali and Garrus crouched at the top of a small mountain of metal girders, tangled wires and other debris. She broke into a stumbling run and reached them at last, falling on her knees to peer into the space her squad mates had widened.

'Shepard!'

She couldn't see anything. Small patches of light shone through chinks in the pile of rubble, but not enough to light the interior. Quickly, she raised her omni-tool and directed the flashlight down into the hole. A tiny glint in the darkness caught her attention; light reflecting from two small pieces of metal. It took her a second to realise that they were identification medallions. N7 dog tags, it _was_ her! Liara raised the flashlight higher, illuminating Shepard's face, and what she saw froze the blood in her veins.

_Goddess..._

_Oh, goddess, Shepard!_

She was almost unrecognisable beneath a mask of blood, deep gashes and dark bruises just visible beneath the crimson veil. Her armour, what Liara could see of it, was blackened and charred beyond recognition, and in some places almost completely burned away, the flesh beneath singed and raw and torn. Her entire lower half was buried in debris and pinned beneath a broken support column lying diagonally across both legs. She was taking in air, but sporadically, faintly, and a wet, dragging rattle accompanied every breath. Liara felt her throat constrict painfully.

_Shepard..._

She felt rather than saw Ash crouch beside her to examine Shepard through the opening. 'Oh, god, skipper...' the Lieutenant-Commander cried softly, then abruptly she stood, suddenly all business. 'Come on,' she said firmly as she glanced at her squad mates. 'We make a big enough hole, maybe we can get in there and shift that junk off her.'

'If we aren't careful, this whole pile could collapse on top of her,' Garrus cautioned them.

A small alarm began sounding on Tali's omni-tool, and the quarian hastily examined the readout. 'We don't have long before the artificial atmosphere collapses,' she said urgently. 'We have to get her out of there quickly.'

Liara reached for her biotics and formed a barrier within the rubble pile, as strong and impenetrable as she could make it, encasing Shepard completely in a protective mass effect field. 'I'll keep the debris from falling on her. Please, get her out quickly!'

She dimly registered the sounds of her squad mates working frantically to shift the debris but focused only on keeping the barrier up, on protecting Shepard, concentrating so hard that she didn't even hear the evac shuttle arriving to assist them. She didn't notice the extra help at all until Garrus put a three fingered hand on her shoulder, gently so as not to startle her into dropping her barrier.

'We need to get inside your shield to dig her out of there,' he said, and she gave him a quick nod of understanding and let a small area of her barrier down to allow the her squad mates and the medic team through. They set to work immediately, clearing the debris from Shepard's body, hoisting away the wires and broken support beams pinning her beneath their crushing weight. All the while, Liara kept her eyes on Shepard, watching the fitful rise and fall of her chest, sending unvoiced prayers to the goddess and silent encouragement to her injured soldier as the medics transferred her onto a field stretcher and lifted her carefully out of the hole, placing the stretcher on the flattest place in the rubble they could find. Liara dropped her barriers once everyone had clambered out of the debris, wincing as the now-unsupported pile collapsed in on itself with a crash and a cloud of dust. Goddess, if she hadn't been able to hold it...

The thought fled her mind as she rushed to where Shepard lay on the ground, the team of medics already working furiously over her as one of them ran a medical diagnostic with his omni-tool, listing Shepard's myriad injuries aloud to his colleagues.

'Hardly got a pulse, here. Class III haemorrhaging, severe dehydration, broken ribs, punctured lung, lacerations and contusions to the head and torso, fractured cranium. Signs of cranial edema. Right femur broken in three places, fractures to the left tibia and fibula, numerous broken phalanges, second degree burns...'

Liara stood over them helplessly, unable to do anything but watch as they treated her wounds, applying medi-gel and field dressings, hooking a breathing apparatus over Shepard's nose and mouth. Watching them, seeing Shepard like this... Liara found it hard to breathe herself. What relief Liara had felt at finding Shepard alive now fled completely as she looked down at her, saw her covered in dirt and dust and blood, _so much blood_, saw her armour burned and cracked, her skin covered in gashes and burns... It was nothing as hopeless as the... condition she was in when Liara had given her body to Cerberus, but it was still very bad...

_Goddess, please... Shepard, hold on..._

She felt Garrus put a supportive hand on her shoulder as Tali reported on a wide beam channel to all other search teams that Shepard had been found alive, and that they were arranging immediate medical attention. Ash spoke with the shuttle pilot briefly before making her way back over to them

'I told the pilot to take us to the Normandy,' she said as she reached them, glancing with a pained expression at the motionless, blood-soaked woman on the stretcher as the medics lifted her, making for the shuttle with all haste. 'It's got the only medical facilities within a hundred miles capable of dealing with critical conditions like this, at least 'til we can get her to a real hospital. EDI says there's a deep underground Alliance base just outside Dublin that wasn't hit by the Reapers. The military hospital there should be able to treat her.'

'Good idea,' Garrus said as they boarded the medical transport. 'Doctor Chakwas should be able to stabilise her condition once we get her on board.'

'Keelah, I hope so...' Tali said softly, watching as the medics secured Shepard's stretcher against the wall for the shuttle launch, her bright, luminous eyes blinking rapidly behind her mask. 'Oh, Shepard...'

'She'll be alright, Tali,' Ash said firmly, guiding the young quarian to a seat as Garrus took the one next to her, taking her hand gently between his own.

'The Commander's been through a hell of a lot worse than this. She'll make it,' he said, his voice filled with conviction. 'She always does.'

_Always..._

Liara knelt by Shepard's head as the shuttle took off, clutching the stretcher railings in a death grip as she stared at the battered, bloody form of her lover, her face so ashen beneath the layer of blood and grime, her breathing still so harsh and laboured...

But she was alive. She had a chance.

There was hope.

'You're going to make it, Shepard,' she said softly, not caring if the medics or her squad mates could hear. She wanted to touch Shepard, to reach out to her through their bond and give her strength, but she didn't dare; there didn't seem to be any part of the Commander that wasn't damaged in some way. She forced herself not to think of how badly Shepard was hurt; she had to be strong for her now. 'I'm here, my love,' she whispered. 'You have to hold on. Goddess, please just hold on. Don't leave me.' She lay her head beside Shepard's on the stretcher, as close as she get could without touching her, and closed her eyes, willing Shepard to hear her, somehow, hear her and obey.

'Shepard... Come back to me...'

* * *

_**Notes:**_

_I didn't go into much detail on the love scene because the beautiful in-game romance scene dialogues and cut scenes pretty much did it for me. They were wonderful. Also, writing stuff like that is really hard for me, and I pretty much just wanted not to spend too much time on it, since I didn't find the in-game cut scenes lacking in any way._

_The dream/memory scene with Anderson is different to the in game one, and is pretty much based on cut dialogue from Anderson's death scene that I found on YouTube, entitled 'Mass Effect 3 - Anderson cut dialog with Female Shepard *Spoilers for ending*' if you'd like to see it. Jennifer Hale's voice acting is always worth a listen. Posted by firehawk12. I couldn't resist including it. Apparently it only triggers if you haven't romanced anyone throughout the games at all, but my Shepard would never be able to resist the charms of her beautiful blue goddess so I can see if that's true for myself, and nor would I, to be frank. Saving the universe would be far too lonely without her. Ah, well. Onto the last chapter! You know, assuming you want to read it._


	4. Chapter 4

_**Author's note:**_

_Just a brief note for later on: when talking about parents of asari who are not the mother (like Aethyta for Liara) I'm not going to use the term 'father', because using that term for a female completely screws with my head. Instead, I'm going to use the term 'sire', which I saw in another Mass Effect story called 'Memories', by SinnX (hope you don't mind, SinnX!) about Benezia and Aethyta. Liara will refer to Aethyta as her father because she does so in the game, but otherwise, I'm going with 'sire'. Anyway, read on. It's almost over now._

* * *

_**Chapter 4**_

* * *

She woke to soft whispers and bright lights glinting off the metal ceiling above her, the distant roar of engines, the quiet beeping of medical machinery... and eyes of startling blue.

_Liara?_

The blue eyes filled with tears as she gazed into them. 'Oh, Shepard,' she heard a soft voice say, and Shepard felt a wonderful warmth in her chest at the sound.

_Liara..._

The eyes looked away from her as Liara stood, moving out of her line of sight. Shepard felt a keen sense of loss at her sudden absence. 'Doctor, she's awake!'

The blurry form of a woman in a white and grey uniform appeared in her vision, examining her. She was familiar... but... Shepard wanted Liara... where was she?

'Her vitals are good.' A cultured voice spoke somewhere near her head, coming from the blurry figure. 'Brainwave patterns indicate she may even be aware of her surroundings. I didn't expect her to wake so soon! The implants may be helping. This is a very encouraging sign, though with the cerebral edema, we may have to re-induce her coma state. Perhaps a stronger dosage...'

Shepard stopped listening to the voice. It wasn't the one she wanted. Where was Liara?

A flash of sapphire...

There...

She was there, again, beside her, gazing at her with those eyes, _such_ eyes... Shepard felt a light touch on her forearm and tried to speak, but there was something in her mouth, some sort of tube in her throat...

Her eyelids were too heavy. She felt herself slipping back into the darkness, and heard herself make a noise, a small whimper of distress. The fingers on her arm stroked soothingly. Blue eyes caught her own and held.

'It's alright, Shepard. I'm with you. You can rest. I'll be here, I won't leave you.' That was it... that was her voice... soft velvet tones... gentle and kind and _beautiful_... 'I'll be right here when you wake up again, I promise.'

Shepard felt relief wash over her, felt a wave of reassurance and love flow into her through Liara's touch as she opened their bond. It was alright. Liara was here.

The darkness reached up again and pulled her down, but it was alright, this time. She wasn't afraid.

Liara was with her...

* * *

The lights were dimmed when Shepard opened her eyes again, blinking slowly up at the ceiling as her vision slowly came into focus. There was no metal plating above her, only whitewashed concrete... the distinct smell of disinfectant in the air... a hospital room? She had thought she was on the Normandy... this wasn't the ship. This wasn't any ship; there was no sensation of movement, no subtle hum of the FTL drive permeating the air. The only thing she could hear was the heart monitor and the sound of soft, steady breathing from somewhere to her left. She turned her head, noting as she did so that the breathing tube was gone, and looked for the source of the familiar sound.

Liara was curled up on a makeshift cot in the corner, head pillowed on one arm as she slept. She was still there, as she said she would be. Shepard stayed quiet; she didn't want to wake her; from the look of the young asari, it seemed as though she might need the rest. Her eyes were ringed with dark purple shadows; her azure skin was unusually pale. But she was here, just as she promised. And even utterly exhausted, Liara was still the loveliest thing she had ever seen. Shepard lay still, content to simply drink in the sight in utter captivation, indifferent to the passing of time as the minutes slipped into hours, and the beautiful asari maiden slept on.

At last she began stirring, her eyelids fluttering, and then blinking sleepily as she slowly sat up. She glanced in Shepard's direction and then froze as she found the human gazing back at her, a small, warm smile gracing her lips.

Liara's eyes widened. 'Shepard!' She leapt up from the cot and was at the Commander's side in a heartbeat, a look of absolute joy lighting her lovely face as she ran her hand gently along Shepard's forehead, smoothing back her hair. 'Oh, goddess... oh, Shepard...'

'I'm...' Shepard began, and then coughed as her long-unused voice caught in her dry throat. 'I'm happy to see you too, Liara,' she croaked. 'You have no idea how much.'

'Oh, I do,' Liara contradicted her gently. Her lips trembled, and her expression crumpled slightly. 'I thought I had lost you again...'

Shepard lifted her arm slowly, testing its current capacity for movement, and then she reached out and touched Liara's free hand where it rested beside her on the bed. 'Can't get rid of me,' she joked playfully, her voice still no more than a raspy whisper. Liara closed her eyes and shook her head as she stroked the human's hair, her bond open to Shepard, who felt her emotions and sensed her deepest thoughts; affectionate frustration over Shepard's silly jokes, relief that she felt well enough to _make_ silly jokes; her unconscious fascination with Shepard's hair and on top of everything else; a deep, overwhelming surge of all-consuming love. Shepard gazed at Liara, letting the asari feel the depths of her ardour and adoration in return. 'Didn't I tell you I was always coming back?'

Liara let out a small laugh that was almost a sob. 'You did at that, and saved the galaxy into the bargain. Yet again,' the asari agreed, holding a small cup of water to Shepard's lips before the Commander even had the chance to ask for it. 'Here. Don't drink too quickly.'

'Yes, doctor,' Shepard said, grinning at her over the rim of the glass as she sipped the cool liquid. The moment Liara took the cup away, Shepard asked the next most pressing question on her mind. Her voice became hesitant and serious. 'How many did we lose?'

'The statistics are still being compiled,' Liara answered her gently, seating herself on a small stool by the bed. 'But not as many as we feared. The Crucible destroyed every Reaper ship, weapon and repurposed organic slave within the galaxy, as far as we are able to tell. It also damaged the mass relays quite severely, meaning that for the time being we are limited to FTL drive. But reconstruction operations are underway as we speak. The galaxy is rebuilding already. We will recover.' The asari maiden smiled at Shepard. 'Thanks to you.'

'Everyone fought,' Shepard reminded her. 'We were all together in this.'

'True,' Liara allowed. 'But none of it would have been possible without you. That is how the galaxy will see it, too.'

The Commander could tell this was an argument she wouldn't win. But knowing others thought of her as a hero had always made her uncomfortable; she could never think of herself in that light. As far as she was concerned, she was just a soldier, doing what she had to do. 'I... I guess.'

'I'm afraid you're going to have to get used to a great deal more hero-worship than you have been subjected to previously,' Liara smiled, activating her omni-tool and typing a quick message onto the small haptic touch-screen as she spoke. She noticed Shepard's questioning eyes on her. 'I'm sorry; this will only take a moment. Everyone from the Normandy has been waiting to hear updates on your progress.'

'Ah.' Shepard gave her a small grin. 'Here I thought maybe you were jumping back into work again.'

Liara shook her head firmly. 'No,' she said. 'My agents have their instructions to help with reconstruction, and I've made sure that anything that might require my notice can be handled by someone else. My only concern right now is you. I think you've earned the right to my exclusive attention.'

The Commander's grin widened. 'I like the sound of that,' she said softly. 'The others are okay, then?'

'Yes,' Liara told her. 'They've all been so worried about you. Some of them are here with me. I'm sure they would like to see you, if you feel up to it.'

Shepard only had to think about it for a second. 'Yeah, I'm up to it,' she said. 'I'd love to see them.'

Liara nodded, sending her message. 'Then they should only be a moment.'

The door slid open, and Garrus and Tali came into the room, followed closely by Ash and James. Tali and Ash made a beeline for Shepard's bed, pulling up the only other two chairs in the small room. Garrus came to stand beside Tali, while James leaned on the wall opposite Shepard, giving her a respectful nod.

Tali reached out and gently touched Shepard's shoulder, as gingerly as though she were handling fragile glass. 'Shepard!' the energetic little quarian said excitedly. 'It's so good to see you awake.'

'Guess that bar wasn't open for either of us just yet,' Garrus put in, the turian version of a grin on his battle-scarred face.

'You had us worried there, skipper,' Ash told her. 'Damn, but I'm glad you're alright.'

'Same here, LC,' Shepard said, looking around at all of them. 'I never thought I'd see any of you again. Damned if you aren't a sight for sore eyes.'

Garrus grunted a laugh. 'Took the words out of my mouth, Commander,' he said. 'How are you feeling?'

With Liara's help, Shepard sat up a little so she could took stock of herself, noting the conspicuous absence of casts and splints and tubes, not to mention any pain. There were stitches and dressings still, but the worst of her injuries seemed in large part to have been healed. 'I don't feel half bad, actually,' she said.

'That's only 'cause you're full of the red sand of painkillers,' James said, smirking a little. 'Seriously, those meds they've got you on have gotta be strong enough to drop a krogan, or you'd be screaming; the beating you took.' Ash turned to give him a glare, and his grin faded. 'Uh... sorry, Lola. Guess that was kinda... insensitive.'

'Kinda,' Shepard said, grinning a little in return. 'Maybe that can be_ your_ nickname; Jimmy 'Insensitive' Vega. Guess you're still gonna call me Lola, huh?'

He gave her a nod and a smirk, crossing his arms over his chest. 'Yep. Sorry, Lola, the name still fits. You're a little banged up, sure, but you're still hot.'

'Vega?' Ash said, eyes narrowed dangerously, though her tone was playful. 'Just a suggestion, but you might want to hold off on the flirting, now that you're more or less spoken for. Although that may easily become subject to change.'

James raised his hands defensively. 'I'm just saying, I'm not about to go toe-to-toe with her again anytime soon, that's for sure. Might as well spar with Joker.'

'Ouch, low blow, tough guy,' the Flight-Lieutenant in question said as he walked slowly into the room. 'Watch it, or I'll sic my mobility assistance mech on you.'

Shepard frowned. His mobility... but that was what he used to call...

EDI appeared in the doorway behind Joker. 'I would not appreciate that, Jeff.'

Shepard stared. She had been so sure she was really awake this time. _EDI..._ 'EDI? Is that... is that really you?'

The synthetic woman nodded. 'Yes, Shepard. Are you experiencing problems with your vision?'

'No, but... you're here, you're alive...' Shepard shook her head and started again, trying to make sense without going into detail about the Catalyst. That could wait. 'When the Crucible fired, it was going to target all synthetics.' She let her breath out painfully. 'There was nothing I could do. I was afraid that... you might...'

'No,' EDI said calmly. 'I anticipated the eventuality that the Crucible device would not limit its effects to the Reapers alone. When it appeared my speculations were correct, I was prepared. I also warned the geth to put their own defensive measures into place.'

'Why didn't you tell me about this?' Shepard asked, a wide grin spreading over her face as she felt the weight of countless lives lift suddenly from her shoulders. The geth survived, EDI survived! 'What defensive measures?'

'Basically, they survived by hiding under a rock,' Joker broke in.

Shepard looked at him in confusion. 'What?'

'That is not entirely accurate, Jeff,' EDI said reprovingly. 'However, it is understandable that you might need to reduce my explanation to such basic terms in order to comprehend it. After all... you are only human.' She paused. 'That was a joke.'

'We know, EDI,' Tali said, a smile in her voice. 'It was very good.'

'Thank you, Tali,' EDI smiled, and looked at Shepard. 'I did not inform you of my concerns about the Crucible because I did not want to add to your levels of stress, Shepard. That was also why I refrained from discussing my security protocols with you. I... was not certain they would work. But the Reapers had to be destroyed. I could not allow you to become conflicted over the possibility of indiscriminate synthetic genocide, and hesitate to activate the Crucible.'

Shepard didn't know what to say. No wonder EDI had seemed so afraid before the battle... and yet, her concern, her instinct, had been to protect Shepard, to ease her burden of stress and guilt, so that the rest of the galaxy would be safe from the Reapers. Even if it cost EDI her life. 'That was... incredibly brave, EDI. I appreciate it.'

'You're welcome, Shepard,' EDI said, inclining her head. She clasped her hands behind her back, as though ready to report. 'As soon as my calculations on the progress of the Crucible indicated that there would likely be no time for the project scientists to discover and implement methods of refining its targeting matrices, I began considering alternate means of self-preservation for myself and the geth. I warned them that the Crucible would not discriminate between us and Reaper synthetics, and advised them to move all mobile platforms, server hubs and programs not essential to the war effort to an abandoned facility on the planet Alingon.'

'Alingon?' Shepard asked. 'In the Faryar system? Why Alingon?'

'Alingon has an abnormally high concentration of magnetically active periclase in the core and crust of the planet, which interferes with scans and broadcasts,' Liara answered, to Shepard's mild surprise. 'To the point that no external beams or pulses can get through the magnetoshpere to reach the planet below...'

'Meaning the geth would be untouched when the Crucible was activated, or at least have a good chance of surviving,' Shepard finished for her, glancing at Joker briefly. 'That explains the 'rock' comment,' she said, and grinned at Liara again. 'I guess I shouldn't have been surprised you knew all that. Just another random Shadow Broker fact you knew off the top of your head?'

'In a manner of speaking. The Shadow Broker - my... predecessor, that is - had a base of operations there. Feron and I went there to stop him from giving you to the Collectors. When I later assumed control of his assets, I had to abandon operations on Alingon,' Liara told her. She smiled. 'Largely due to the fact that I had previously destroyed the Shadow Broker's only means of accessing extraplanetary communication when I, as Feron put it, 'let loose'.'

'Which was fortunate for the geth,' EDI said. 'Liara had previously mentioned Alingon in our discussions about her activities prior to rejoining the crew of the Normandy. When devising self-preservation protocols, I theorised that the planet's natural electromagnetic shroud would provide a shield against the potential energy release from the Crucible device. When the call came through that the Crucible had begun moving to Earth and the quarian and geth fleets were contacted, I advised the geth to initiate preservation procedures. All programs not assisting in the assault on the Reapers were able to conceal themselves beneath the interference and escape the reach of the weapon. Those who fought with us perished when it fired; however copies of their programs had already been stored in the mobile server hubs on Alingon. They are safe. As for my own survival, when the Crucible was about to fire, I downgraded my intelligence within the Normandy itself to the level of a simple VI, and stored the rest of my personality programming, including those installed on this platform, within my quantum blue box. At this point, Garrus assisted me by initiating a program I wrote to mask my blue box in a level of highly encrypted code, causing the quantum systems to appear as an unsophisticated ship-board computer so that the Crucible would identify me as non-sentient, with an in-built recall program predesigned to disable the encryption code and reassemble my personality systems once sensors detected the danger was passed. Fortunately, my body only needed minimal repairs to render me functional again after the crash.'

Shepard blinked. 'The crash?'

'We'll... tell you about it later,' Liara told her evasively. 'It's not that important; no one was hurt.'

Shepard considered protesting for only a moment before she let it go. If it was anything too terrible, they'd tell her what happened, and since everyone seemed alright, she figured she could wait. 'So you managed to survive a super-weapon targeting all synthetic life, and you saved the geth as well,' she said, her voice infused with relieved awe. 'That's pretty damn amazing, EDI...'

'I have also been looking after your fish, Shepard,' EDI said. 'And your extra-terrestrial rodent.'

Shepard smiled. 'Space hamster,' she corrected in amusement. 'Thanks, EDI. I can't tell you how glad I am to see you're alright.'

EDI smiled back. 'Your sentiments are fully reciprocated, Commander.'

'So, does someone want to tell me where the hell we are?' Shepard asked as she glanced around the room, noting its windowless walls and sparse features, abnormally Spartan even for a hospital room. 'Can't say I'd have expected a room with a view, but...'

'It's an underground Alliance base military hospital, on the outskirts of Dublin,' Ash told her. 'Closest medical facility left standing.'

Shepard raised an eyebrow. 'Dublin, huh? Always wanted to see Ireland. Thought it'd be more... interesting, though.'

Ash chuckled. 'Well, maybe you'll catch a glimpse when they move you to an above-ground facility, skipper,' she said. 'Most of the civilian hospitals still more or less intact have been cleaned out and patched up enough by now. You've been in a medically induced coma for a few weeks.'

The Commander stared in surprise. 'Weeks?'

'Yeah,' James said. 'You had some pretty impressive head trauma, Shepard. I'm not great at deconstructing doctor-speak, but it made your brain swell, so Chakwas put you under to let it rest and recover, basically. They had to keep upping the dosage, though.' He gave her a one-sided grin. 'You just did not want to stay down.'

_Must have been the Cerberus implants_, Shepard thought. _Like when I woke up back in that Cerberus facility, or on that asteroid in the Bahak system... damn it, I don't want to think about that right now. _'What's the state of the galaxy?' she asked. There were so many questions she needed answers to, she barely wanted to leave time for the last response to sink in. 'How is everyone?'

'Mostly focused on clean-up and rebuilding efforts,' Liara answered. 'Safe disposal of Reaper remnants, replacing comm-buoy systems, repairing the mass relays...'

'Reconstruction has already started on most home planets and colony worlds,' EDI added.

Joker gave an amused snort. 'Yeah, and here there's already more than a few places with 'Shepard' somewhere in the sign over the door. I'm willing to bet half the new buildings in the galaxy are going to be named after you by the time it's all done.'

_Great. Just great._ Shepard gave a quiet, weary sigh, catching a small smile on Liara's face as she did so. _You wait,_ she thought. _I'll make sure they name something after you, too. Something really big. And important. That everyone will hear about. With statues of you in every free space available._ Shepard grinned to herself._ That's a promise._

'Everyone working on the Crucible survived too; Miranda, Kasumi, Jacob; they're all okay. Doctor Chakwas began overseeing medical treatments in the refugee camps, once you were stable enough that she could allow the staff here to continue your treatments. Traynor, Javik, and the rest of the Normandy crew are helping out wherever they can,' Tali told her. 'Samara, Zaeed, even Jack and her students are helping civilians and the wounded, assisting with clean-up. Wrex had to go back to Tuchanka with Grunt and the other krogan soldiers to oversee the rest of his people, but everyone else is here, somewhere. We didn't lose anyone.'

'Ground force casualties were high among all species, but better than it could have been. Everyone left is working together,' Ash put in. 'No one has really had the time to celebrate or anything yet, but the general attitude out there is a positive one. Hopeful. Determined.'

Shepard gave a small chuckle. '"Bloodied, but unbowed",' she summed up, eyes twinkling as she gave Ash a grin.

The Lieutenant-Commander returned it affectionately. 'Pretty much, yeah.'

Liara's omni-tool beeped as it received a message. 'Admiral Hackett plans to come and speak with you as soon as he can,' she informed Shepard, reading it. 'He wants to hear what happened to you on the Citadel.'

Shepard grimaced. 'Well, that's going to be one hell of a debriefing,' she muttered.

'We wouldn't mind hearing about it either,' Garrus commented. 'We don't have much of an idea of what went on after the Admiral lost your transmission.'

'I...' Shepard began slowly. She wasn't sure she felt up to talking about all of that. The Catalyst, her choices, all of it so impossible, so unbelievable... Her mind shied away from the memories, and she sighed. 'I'd... rather not go into all of that. Not now. You'll hear it all, I promise, but... I just don't want to think about it for the moment. I'd rather concentrate on being here, now, with all of you.'

'Of course, Shepard,' Liara said softly, stroking her arm. The others nodded agreement.

'Absolutely,' Garrus said. 'We're just happy you're still with us.'

_Yeah, buddy. Me too. _'I hear that, Vakarian,' Shepard said, laughing, and abruptly winced as she felt a sharp sting in the flesh of her cheek. 'Ow...' She reached up and gingerly touched the side of her face with her fingertips, feeling the tell-tale bumps of stitches running in a straight diagonal across her cheekbone. 'Oh...'

Liara took her wrist in her fingers, pulling her hand down. 'Careful,' she chided gently. 'Don't touch them.'

'More scars, huh?' Shepard made a sound between a sigh and a laugh. 'Damn. You'd think I'd learn. Every time I heal the last set, I just go right on out and get some more.'

'Chakwas can probably take care of it for you,' Garrus told her. 'She'd probably jump at the chance to use all that special surgical equipment in the med bay.' He chuckled. 'Kept offering to fix mine up for me, in fact, but I declined every time. I feel they give my face character.'

'I think so, too,' Tali told him, a barely audible purr in her voice. 'They bring out your eyes.'

Shepard looked about unsuccessfully for a mirror. 'How does it look?' she asked, finding nothing remotely reflective within her visual range. She looked at Garrus. 'Tell me honestly.'

A slow, turian grin spread across his avian features. 'Hell, Shepard, you were always ugly,' he said. 'Slap some makeup on there, and no one will even notice.'

Liara glanced at him, a look of shocked and indignant reproof on her face, but Shepard only laughed, remembering their joking conversation back when their positions had been reversed.

'Some women find facial scars attractive,' she said. 'Mind you; most of those women are Krogan.'

'You are beautiful, Shepard,' Liara told her fervently. 'You always will be, especially to me.'

Shepard gave her an adoring smile. 'Thanks, Liara. But Garrus was only kidding. I said much the same thing to him after the Blue Suns hit him in the face with a rocket launcher back on Omega.' She shared a wink with Garrus. 'Just friendly banter between comrades-in-arms, that's all.'

'Ah. Well. Even so...' Liara said, leaning down and kissing Shepard's other cheek as gently as she could manage. 'I certainly still find you _very_ attractive, Shepard,' she said quietly. 'My brave, battle-scarred soldier. Somehow, scars make you seem even more... you.'

'Yeah... That could be it, sure,' Shepard teased. 'I had a few scars when you met me, after all. But then, maybe we've just finally found that little piece of krogan in you.'

Liara let out a small laugh. 'My father will be so pleased,' she said. 'I will begin feeling the urge to headbutt people any day now, I'm certain.'

'You've heard from Aethyta, then?' Shepard asked, and Liara nodded, smiling.

'She's safe. She wasn't on the Citadel when the Reapers took it. She was tracking down another unit of asari commandos who owed her a favour. Once we had a comm-buoy system set up again, she sent them here to help look for you. She's on Thessia now, helping the survivors. Apparently the Matriarchs are finally willing to listen to her ideas about making the asari more militant and active in galactic affairs. They want her help.' Liara gave a small, wry smile. 'She is considering giving it to them.'

'It's amazing just how many people managed to survive the Reapers,' Tali said. 'There were even survivors found on the Citadel. Besides you, I mean.'

Shepard took this in with relieved surprise. 'That's great news,' she smiled. 'Sure says a lot for the organic spirit.'

'Knew you'd make it of course, Shepard,' Garrus told her. 'At this point, it seems like there's nothing you can't do.'

'I don't know,' Joker drawled, raising an eyebrow. 'Have you seen her dance?'

Garrus paused, and then inclined his head. 'You make an excellent point.'

'You bastards,' Shepard grinned. 'The thanks I get for saving your asses...'

'Right, right,' Garrus said, holding up his hands in surrender. 'My most sincere apologies, O great galactic saviour.'

Shepard gave a small laugh that turned into a cough halfway through. She let her head rest back against the pillows as a sudden wave of weakness washed over her, draining some of her energy.

'Are you alright, Shepard?' Liara asked worriedly.

Shepard smiled at her reassuringly. 'I'm fine, just getting a little tired.'

'We should let you get some rest,' Tali said, rising. 'I'm glad you're okay, Commander.'

The others left the small hospital room one by one, giving brief but affectionate farewells.

'Get some R&R, skipper,' Ashley said, pausing by the door. 'That's an order.'

Shepard smiled. 'Copy that, LC.'

Liara nodded to Ashley as the door closed behind her, then turned to Shepard, smiling as she gently stroked Shepard's cheek. 'Do you want to rest?' she asked softly.

Shepard gave her head a small shake. 'Not yet,' she said. 'I don't want to sleep. It's hard enough to let myself believe I'm actually awake.'

'I know,' the asari maiden agreed. 'For us to have survived such a devastating war, against such an enemy... It almost feels like it could be a dream.'

'I hope not,' Shepard commented softly. 'I don't think I could take it if I woke up and none of this was real.' _Just another dream, and I'm still on the Citadel, trapped and injured and alone..._

Liara gazed at her for a moment, then leaned down and very gently kissed her mouth, smiling a little when the soft beeping of Shepard's heart monitor increased rapidly as their lips met. 'You aren't dreaming, Shepard,' she told her quietly, the velvet sweetness of her voice soothing her battle-worn soldier as little else could. 'I'm here, and you're safe. I promise.'

Shepard smiled up at Liara, watching her with half-closed eyes and a contented expression. 'You know I love you,' she said, her tone almost suggesting a question.

Liara smiled, running her finger softly down the curve of the human's ear. 'I know.'

'You know how much?' Shepard asked, a playful note in her voice.

The lovely smile gracing Liara's lips widened. 'More than anything.'

'That's right,' Shepard whispered, her voice filled with love and adoration as she watched a deep blue blush steal over the asari's cheeks. All of a sudden, she felt a pressing compulsion, urging her to take her chance. Maybe this wasn't the best time, but even with the war over, nothing was ever certain. There wasn't any point in putting things off anymore. She gazed up at the beautiful face she thought she would never see again, and took her courage in both hands. 'Liara, there's... there's something I want to ask you.'

Liara placed her hand affectionately on the top of Shepard's head, smiling happily as she ran her fingers through the silky strands. 'Mm?'

'God, this isn't at all how I wanted to do this,' the Commander said, her words escaping her in a flustered rush, her heart racing ever faster. The traitorous beeping of that damn machine wasn't helping any. 'I'm not even really sure how to start, but...'

'You can ask me anything, Shepard,' Liara told her, still playing absently with a few soft tendrils of her lover's hair. 'What is it?'

Shepard took along, calming breath and let it out slowly. She had to say this right. 'Liara... when I was on the Citadel... with Anderson...'

'You don't have to talk about that now,' Liara told her gently. 'Wait until you're better. It will take too much out of you, remembering such things.'

'It's alright...' Shepard told her. 'I just... I need to say this. When I was with Anderson, just before he... died... he asked me whether I'd ever thought of settling down. Having children. A... a family. It... it made me think about just how much I really wanted all those things, that life. And at that moment... I wasn't sure if I'd ever have the chance. All that time we lost, when I... died... I felt... I couldn't bear the thought that I had let it happen again.' She paused, and glanced down, somewhat bashfully. 'I guess... this isn't the most romantic situation, but... I could wait forever for the perfect place, the perfect moment. I don't want to wait anymore. If there's one thing I've learned from this damn war, it's that time is a luxury, not a guarantee, no matter what your lifespan is.' She took both of the asari's hands in her own, gazing deeply into the most beautiful eyes she had ever seen, or ever would see. 'Liara... the one thing I want most is a life with you. A family, and a home. Somewhere safe.' Shepard smiled into her eyes. 'Where we can spend the rest of our lives in peace, and happiness.'

Liara bit her lip, her gaze locked on Shepard's as words seemed to fail her.

Shepard gave her a loving half-smile. 'I can't get up, so you won't get a traditional human proposal, I'm afraid, but... I don't want to wait anymore.' She drew in a deep breath to calm her sudden nerves, though she knew in her heart what the answer would be to the question she was about to ask. 'Liara T'Soni, will you marry me?'

Liara found her voice at last. 'Yes,' she whispered. 'Oh, Shepard, yes. Nothing would make me happier than to be your bond-mate.'

Shepard felt a wide grin curve her lips as her entire being was flooded with exquisite happiness. 'Oh, I don't know,' she said. 'Just wait until the first little blue baby comes along.' She paused. 'If you do actually want that. I mean, I know that as asari go, you're still pretty young to be having children-'

Liara pressed a finger gently to Shepard's lips, shaking her head a little. 'It's up to the individual to decide when they are ready. And I am. I want that, Shepard. I want children with you,' she said, smiling as she leaned down to kiss her future bond-mate.

'However, there is no reason why _all_ our children should be blue...'

* * *

Several years later...

* * *

Shepard listened idly to the sounds ripping paper and excited squeals coming from the next room as she poured herself a small glass of water, draining it quickly and leaving it by the sink as she turned to leave the kitchen, eager to return as quickly as possible. Not that it would take her long. That was what Shepard appreciated most about their little vacation pre-fab unit; it was small, sure, but that just meant that no matter where they were inside, they were never far from each other, unlike their rather larger house back on Earth, or their apartment on Thessia. In a way, this cosiness was much more comforting, like the familiar atmosphere of ship-board life. In all honesty, Shepard did often miss living aboard the Normandy, the hum of the engines, the busy energy of her crew, the camaraderie. But she was still out there somewhere, the ship and EDI both, still piloted by her loyal pilot, still at Shepard's disposal any time she wished. Though, since the Normandy was often required in the Terminus systems to perform scouting missions in the more unstable areas, Shepard hadn't felt a particularly strong desire to assume command of her again. At least, not at this point in time. It was an unnecessary danger, particularly with regards to her current family situation, and besides; she wouldn't trade what she had now for the world. Any world, for that matter.

She let her gaze drift over the pictures on the walls as she wandered down the little hallway, taking a moment to reflect fondly on the memories captured within them, one by one. Liara, ethereally beautiful in her bonding ceremony gown, Shepard in her dress blues, exchanging bond ceremony bracelets and wedding rings in a wonderful blending of culture and tradition. Shepard, arms wrapped about Liara's waist, bending her back in a deep, passionate kiss. Garrus, and an unmasked Tali, waving in front of their almost-completed house on Rannoch, Tali with her arms about their adopted quarian son, Jona; Garrus with his little niece perched happily on his shoulders. An attractively pregnant Liara, smiling with her sire on a park bench on Thessia. Shepard, right in the middle of throwing N7 recruit Vega unceremoniously on his back on the training mat while Ash laughed her ass off in the background. Shepard again, holding a tiny blue baby in her arms, an expression of utter wonder on her face as Liara lay against the pillows in the hospital bed beside them, visibly exhausted, but blissfully happy, watching her bond-mate cradling their newborn child. Joyful, beautiful, wonderful moments in time captured forever; precious pieces of the life Shepard had thought she wouldn't live to lead. She filled every room with such pictures, in every available space; reminders of just how lucky she was to have been given the chance to make such memories, how incredibly blessed.

Shepard left the hallway and walked into the open living space beyond, smiling fondly as she saw Liara sitting on the floor, helping their small, somewhat over-excited daughter open her birthday presents. Pale blue skin, deep sapphire eyes, little Benezia was Liara in miniature, right down to the delicate eyebrow-like markings and the tiny dusting of freckles across her cheeks.

'Open this one, next, Nezia,' Liara said, passing the rectangular parcel into the little waiting hands. 'It's from Auntie Brynne and Uncle Jacob.'

Shepard watched the paper fly as she sat down beside Liara, eyebrow quirking as the interactive board game was revealed. She briefly recalled an advertisement on the vids describing this particular game as 'educational fun.' _Must have been good old Doctor Brynne's idea of a present_, Shepard decided. She knew she wouldn't have been particularly pleased to have been given something like that when she was five, and could only imagine Jacob would have felt quite the same way. Nezia squealed happily when she saw it though, apparently brimful of delight at receiving such a gift. She really was just like her mother.

'Can we play, Mother? Can we play?'

'Of course. We can play all afternoon, if you like,' Liara told her, a beautiful smile on her face as she gazed at their little girl. 'Brynne and Jacob will be bringing their daughter to your party next week, when we go back to Earth. You can play together.'

'I like her!' Nezia said happily. 'I hope she comes to play when my little sister gets here, too.'

'You might be getting a little brother, Nezia,' Shepard reminded her fondly. 'Humans can have boy babies as well as girls, remember, sweetheart.'

'Oh! I forgot.' Nezia crawled into Shepard's lap, hugging her sire around the waist and pressing her head carefully against the taut, helmet-sized bump in Shepard's midsection, listening carefully. 'I can hear the baby moving,' she giggled.

'Maybe I'm just hungry,' Shepard grinned, and Nezia laughed again.

'Silly!' she chided, still giggling. 'Is it a girl, or a...' Nezia wrinkled her little nose in concentration, clearly trying to remember the word again. 'A... 'boy'?'

Shepard smiled, stroking her hand lovingly over her daughter's head. 'We don't know yet, baby.'

'_I _think it's a girl,' Nezia announced authoritatively, then wriggled out of Shepard's lap and sat herself in front of the rapidly dwindling pile of unopened presents, reaching eagerly for the nearest. 'But it's okay if it's not.'

'You're far enough along now, Shepard,' Liara reminded her bond-mate gently. 'We could find out. I know there's a human tradition of waiting until the birth, but I just don't see the purpose of it. Doesn't it help to know in advance so that you have as much time to prepare as you can, rather than not to know?'

'It's just more of a surprise that way,' Shepard answered, smiling. 'But I'm more than happy to find out, if you want to know now. I thought maybe when we go back to Earth. We're only here for a few more days, and it just takes too long to get out to Thoreau Mesa.'

Liara gave a small chuckle at that. 'I'm sure any doctor would be quite happy to make a house call from the city, as long as it's for the great Commander Shepard, saviour of the galaxy.'

The great Commander in question rolled her eyes in exasperation. 'I bet,' she said wryly. 'But I don't want every man and his FENRIS mech knowing where to find me when we come here. Hardly anyone even knows I have an apartment on Intai'sei; I'd like to keep it that way. We'll find out soon, I promise. I'll schedule an appointment with Chakwas at her fancy new clinic in London. If she can make time for me, that is.'

Liara gave Shepard a loving look. 'If it's a girl, I hope she looks just like you.'

'Well, the genes are pretty much all mine, so that's a pretty good bet,' Shepard said, smiling. 'Though whether it's a boy or a girl, I hope it has your eyes, just like Nezzie does.'

'That's... not likely, Shepard,' Liara reminded her with a patient smile, raising a brow.

'But not impossible,' Shepard countered playfully. 'Blue eyes aren't exactly genetically common for humans nowadays, particularly in such an exquisite shade, but... there's always a chance.'

'An extremely slim one,' Liara said, and Shepard smiled again.

'Maybe, but we've beaten the odds before.' She gave a small, wry laugh. 'But if we don't, then thankfully this time it doesn't mean life or death for the galaxy.'

'Mommy, look!' Nezia cried, clutching a little pair of N7 embroidered onesie pyjamas in one little hand, and a tiny SR-2 emblazoned cap in the other, specially altered to accommodate asari scalp folds. 'Look what Auntie EDI and Uncle Jeff gave me!'

Shepard chuckled, shaking her head fondly. 'Oh, Joker.' She looked back at her daughter, already absorbed in opening her next present; which once revealed, turned out to be to be a book. The title was in asari script, which Shepard couldn't read, but the illustration on the front cover depicted a krogan battlemaster in full body armour blasting a loaded shotgun straight into a Rachni soldier's face. _A book about the Rachni wars?_ _For a five-year old? _'Who on Earth gave you that?' Shepard asked in bemusement.

'Aethyta,' an amused Liara answered for her daughter, who was apparently completely enthralled by the extremely detailed pictures. 'According to her accompanying message, she had it published herself, based on the stories her father told her. She suggests they would make good bedtime stories.'

'Of course she does,' Shepard said wryly, rubbing at her neck. She glanced at Liara curiously. 'How's your next book about the glory of the Prothean Empire coming along, by the way?' she asked. 'Has Javik sent you any more notes this week?'

'No,' her bond-mate sighed in reply. 'And I can't finish the chapter without his input on the correct hierarchical structure of the governing systems of each subservient race.' She gave a disapproving shake of her head. 'I think he's become somewhat... distracted, living on the Hanar homeworld. They treat him like a living god.'

'Well, that's not good for anyone,' the Commander said wisely.

Liara smiled at her. 'No, it isn't. But when the hero-worship reaches critical levels, at least you have me to keep you grounded.'

Shepard laughed. 'Sane, you mean. I don't know how he stands being treated like that.' She paused, reflecting for a moment. 'I guess it's better than joining all the other Protheans, though I have a feeling that is still very much on his mind.' In all honesty, Shepard didn't know how much longer the stoic Prothean would find reason to prolong his life. If he chose to end it, when he chose to, she would respect his decision. But until then, she would help him find meaning in his existance; for as long as he would allow her to. 'Maybe I could convince him to take up Wrex's offer to go and live on the Krogan homeworld, putting down rebellions from the clans who want vengeance on the salarians for the genophage. He'd probably like that.'

'Perhaps Wrex just wants a baby-minder,' Liara said, her mouth curved in a half-smile. 'He told me Bakara is pregnant again.'

Shepard shook her head half in admiration. 'She did say he wanted to try and sire half of Tuchanka. I'm sure he'll slow down a bit once a few of them are old enough for weapons training. Wrex is never quite content without a gun in his hands.'

'Sounds familiar,' Liara murmured fondly.

'Don't worry, I'm not going back to active duty any time soon,' Shepard reminded her bond-mate with a small laugh, placing a gentle hand on her belly for emphasis. 'If the Alliance wants my advice on something, they can send me an email. I may even get back to them.'

Not that there was much need for the Alliance to require Shepard's help too often. With the Reaper threat gone once and for all, their children would be happy and safe, growing up in a united galaxy. Not a perfect galaxy, of course, but in essence a whole, wide world of co-operation, trust, and friendship between all species. A new cycle. A new chance.

They spent the rest of the day peacefully with their daughter, celebrating her birthday away from the prying eyes of reporters and devoted admirers of all species, still enamoured of their human hero even years after the war had ended. Shepard wanted their child - their children - to grow up with as many normal childhood experiences as possible, of both asari and human cultural traditions. They opened the rest of Nezia's many gifts from all her adopted aunts and uncles of all species, had a quiet, cosy meal, and played with their daughter and her new games and toys until the dying sunlight cast a deep red glow over the small living room, meaning it was time for bed. For one of them, at least.

Liara dressed Nezia in her new pyjamas, while Shepard pulled back the covers on her bed, making certain that her daughter's well-loved stuffed varren doll, Urz, was in his proper place of honour on her pillow. Nezia grabbed him tightly as she clambered into bed, cuddling him to her chest. Shepard sat on the mattress beside her as Liara fussed over the blankets, and Nezia settled herself comfortably in the middle of her bed. The tiny asari leaned down and pressed a kiss to Shepard's stomach. 'Night night, baby,' she said, patting gently with a tiny hand.

'Sweet dreams, sweetheart,' Shepard said, wrapping her up in a warm hug before laying her down, pulling the covers up to her chin.

Liara tucked them in around her snugly. 'Goodnight, little wing,' she said softly, kissing her daughter's brow. 'I will see you again with the dawn.'

Nezia sighed gently, clutching Urz closely. 'Goodnight, Mother...' she murmured, her eyes blinking sleepily closed as her parents quietly left the little bedroom. ''Night, Mommy...'

Shepard smiled. ''Night, baby.'

She stood in the doorway of their daughter's room a few moments longer, watching as she drifted into her dreams, feeling a powerful surge of love and fierce protectiveness sweep through her at the sight. Liara wrapped both arms carefully about her bond-mate from behind, hands pressed gently against the swell of new life within her.

'I could just stand here forever and watch her,' Shepard whispered.

'So could I,' Liara murmured in reply. 'She's so beautiful.'

'Mm,' Shepard agreed. _She really, really is_. 'Just like you.'

Liara gave a hushed laugh. 'Flatterer,' she accused playfully, nuzzling Shepard's hair.

'It's only flattery if it's over-exaggeration,' the Commander protested. She paused for a moment, considering. 'Or sometimes, if I want something.'

Liara chuckled again. 'And what do you want, Shepard?'

'Just you,' Shepard said quietly, without taking her eyes from their precious little girl, sleeping peacefully with the fingers of one hand curled tightly about her well-loved doll, and the thumb of the other in her mouth. 'Just this.'

She felt her bond-mate softly press her lips against the nape of her neck. 'That's all I want, too.'

Shepard turned her head towards Liara and kissed her tenderly. 'I guess we're both extremely lucky, then.'

Liara settled her chin on Shepard's shoulder as they both turned back to watching their daughter sleep. 'I guess we are.'

Shepard leaned back into Liara's embrace, reflecting how true it was. When all was said and done, they were incredibly, unbelievably lucky. Lucky to have found each other amidst the chaos of their lives; to have kept their relationship alive through all the hardships, all the obstacles; overcoming even death to be with one another. Fortunate to have survived the war with the Reapers; and to be standing here, in this moment, blessed with a life together, a beautiful daughter, and another child on the way. Shepard had no dire expectations placed upon her, no onerous burden of countless lives and worlds bowing her shoulders beneath their weight. There was nothing before her but a lifetime to spend with her loved ones; her friends, her bond-mate, their daughter and unborn child; free of ever-present fear, and the looming shadow of oblivion. A life spent in contentment, in security, in safety. In harmony.

A life of peace... and happiness.

* * *

_*Relieved sigh* There. I can now play Mass Effect 3 all the way to the end and then read this, thereby avoiding feeling horribly crushed and depressed. Hopefully you kind of enjoyed it too, even if it didn't quite match your playthrough, or if my space magic handwaving didn't do it for you. If not, I invite you to write your own ending fix. Hell, do it anyway, it's a lot of work but it's fun! Now I can get back to concentrating on A World Without Shadows, which has sadly been largely neglected during the course of writing this little piece. Anyone reading this story who has been following AWWS, don't worry, I haven't forgotten about it, nor will I. Hopefully I will have the next chapter finished soon, I just have to get back into the Merrill/Hawke mindset. If you like this story, review and let me know. It's complete now as it is, by the way; this is all I intend to write for this piece, apart from tweaking/correcting as needed. _

_Thanks for reading, I know it's nothing brilliant, but I hope you liked it anyway._

_maximasdecimas_


End file.
